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hwam.bsky.social
Old enough to know better. Stupid enough to care about it. Daft enough to keep on doing it anyway. Creates VISION ON SOUND for FAB RADIO INTERNATIONAL, and draws a bit šŸ˜€
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ā€¦also thinking about that very powerful scene at the end of TWELVE ANGRY MEN where they all turn their back on the one ranting awayā€¦ wonder if that might ever happen at a G12 meetingā€¦?

Imagining a version of WILLY WONKA 2 where several world leaders get invited on a factory tour, and get turned into a sherbet lemon, some fudge, and a chocolate orangeā€¦

ā€œBut I want my Peace Prize! I want it! I want it! I want it!ā€ screamed the angry toddler menacingly. He also wanted all the toys in the other kidā€™s toy box, but he decided to keep quiet about that for the momentā€¦

Playing politics with peopleā€™s lives like the game show host that he is really isnā€™t going to blow up in all our faces is itā€¦? šŸ˜±

Knitted Gruntleigh seems happy to be reading the advance proofsā€¦ www.lulu.com/shop/martin-...

Walk of the Week (280225): Fernilee & Taxal

ā€œDo you remember dodgy Uncle Fred? That terrible but wealthy conmanā€¦ The one you said the entire family should shun because he was so awful?ā€ asked Ada, pointedly. I nodded, sadly. ā€œWell, your fatherā€™s only gone and invited him to join us all at our special celebration dinnerā€¦!ā€ #NewAlanBennetts

Astonishingly, so far nine lovely people have taken the enormously flattering leap of faith in ordering my latest literary effort despite only two people in the world having actually read it. One of you ordered several copies (which Iā€™m hoping wasnā€™t a mistake). Many, many thanks to all of you šŸ˜€

Just announced! Blakeā€™s 7: Series 2 Blu-ray Collection Of interest to many Doctor Who fans, comes the remastered Blu-ray set of Series 2 of its ā€œsister showā€, made by many of the same creatives. Pre-order now, release date TBC. amzn.to/3DiVbyo

Lining up trio of classic crime filmsā€¦

GRUNTLEIGH THE OGRON AND THE COMPLICATIONS OF CHAOS Available now via: www.lulu.com/shop/martin-...

We always knew that Ben Peters had never been interested in our long-term future. He was only concerned about being as rich as possible when they buried him. Ironically when digging his grave, they found neither oil nor gas, just a void like the one where his heart should have been #NewAlanBennetts

šŸŽ¶ I did write fifty thousand words šŸŽ¶ And I may write fifty thousand more šŸŽ¶ Yes, I am the sort of bloke šŸŽ¶ Whoā€™d write so many words šŸŽ¶ To make one joke work moreā€¦

GRUNTLEIGH THE OGRON AND THE COMPLICATIONS OF CHAOS Available soon from the Lulu Bookstore

I appear to have written something resembling a book and it should be available just as soon as the Big Guy's earth agent has finished reading it. Anyway, here's a sneak preview...

Despite his unfortunate speech the committee invited Harold to address them once again. He started off claiming to be ā€˜sorryā€™ for any ā€˜offensive remarksā€™ he may have made, before making a whole lot of new ones. Ada fumed ā€œHeā€™s not sorry at all!ā€ she cried, flinging a Custard Cream #NewAlanBennetts

Mabel rolled her eyes, sighed, & reached for another Jaffa Cake ā€œHeā€™s up on the roof now, determined not to miss the ā€˜celestial spectacleā€™ even though I said that the weather presenter he likes (you know the one; all skin-tight frocks and inviting smiles) forecast bucketing rain.ā€ #NewAlanBennetts

Leaning rather smugly on the new fence, Tom announced that it was never about expanding his territory, it was just that Doris lost the stone from her eternity ring during the neighbourā€™s fondue party in 1974, and he didnā€™t want the new owners to build their extension on top of it. #NewAlanBennetts

Having sat next to a corpse on their flight, when pressed Elsie fumed ā€œI suppose it wasnā€™t really a ā€˜traumaā€™ as such, it was just that Harold insisted that it spoke more sense than I did, and I thought the very least they could have done was to offer us its spare puddingā€¦ā€ #NewAlanBennetts

Electrical problems at FAB TOWERS tonight mean that this weekā€™s show will be online only after 7:00 tonightā€¦ We apologise for the inconvenience.

@whc100.bsky.social Ah! There you areā€¦ šŸ‘

Walk of the Week (210225): Stanage Edge

ā€œā€¦or ā€˜Captain Mexicoā€™ as the rest of the world prefers to call itā€¦ā€

He tensed as the door suddenly opened. A sibilant voice taunted him from the darkened hallway. ā€œAh! The late Mr Bond. We were expecting you. Between 10:20 and 1:30, and we tracked your vehicle from when you were eight stops away. Now hand over the deviceā€¦ā€

Brian would watch apocalyptic dramas on television, and kept saying that at least, when it came, the real pandemic didnā€™t wipe out the entire human race. Ethel would then look up from her Womanā€™s Realm and darkly reply ā€œOh it did, my love, but we just havenā€™t realised it yet.ā€ #NewAlanBennetts

Nobody at the knitting circle had a good word to say about Mabelā€™s new lodger, and couldnā€™t understand why she didnā€™t just throw him out. Ada asked this as they all gloomily gathered around the cake stand. Mabel said nothing, but simply reached out and took the largest meringue. #NewAlanBennetts

Wiggy had form in backing the wrong horse; always being drawn to sad old mares that were clinging on for dear life to past glories. Heā€™d always claim that they had won, of course, and challenge anyone who confronted him with the results page in the Racing Post to prove him wrong. #NewAlanBennetts