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ignoblebacteria.bsky.social
sitting in a urinal to shit and breaking it off the wall with my damn ass
90 posts 7 followers 40 following
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Posts 25 Comments 25

every fucker who has worked for ICE has never made a woman cum, amd my willy is much bigger than all theirs combined

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Shitting on brian thompsons corpse to own the ljbs

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

im gpnna poo and its gonna come out mY bum

submitted 74 days ago • 0 comments

using milf messenger to own the libs (and not cause im horney) pleaee no speculation at this private time - JC

submitted 122 days ago • 0 comments

glueing three picatinny rails to my cock so I can add a tactical grip, laser sight, and red dot sight to increase wank speed by 50%, hipfire jizz accuracy by 40%, and aim down cock accuracy by 69%

submitted 145 days ago • 1 comment

[To the tune of song of Song 2 by Blur] All of the times that I've ever got my cock hard, got my cock harddddd

submitted 146 days ago • 1 comment

[To the tune of buddy holly by weezer] What's with these homies sucking my dad? Why can't they get him off?

submitted 147 days ago • 0 comments

trump: they're eating the cats, they're eating the dawgs Me: they're sucking the legs, they're eating the frogs, drop the beat c'mon, whoa yeah yeah yeah also I hope you die soon

submitted 183 days ago • 0 comments

Pokerus has gone woke, unfortunately

submitted 197 days ago • 0 comments

putting the beats by dr dre mask from the advert on my dick (as a joke) and it silces me clean off when it opens

submitted 261 days ago • 0 comments

playing john cage 4:33 so i can finally listen to my damn asshole

submitted 330 days ago • 0 comments

fathr i cannot tell a lie I rammed thatbridge

submitted 358 days ago • 0 comments

sir a second mildo [man dildo] has gone uo my ass

submitted 366 days ago • 0 comments

rimming out the window and cumming out the window are two different thjngs

submitted 368 days ago • 0 comments

me: yeah man you remember shakin stevens, right? judge: sir that is not how we refer to MS

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

Me: and that, sir, is why you won't find good tail for under £70 LFC: get out

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

Doc Venture: i don't know boys a dildo seems awfully risque Hank amd Dean: aw come on pop Doc Venture: [exit stage left] go team venture

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

[in the voice of Les Dawson] where would we be without good fisting? right here, that's where

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

[In the voice of jurgen klopp] what do you mean "to do the fisting?" I know only of gegenpressen

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

Me: so that's how I skinned him in one fell swoop haha Gary linekar: welcome to match of the gay Me: homophobe

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

Alistair Campbell: please leave the war out Me: just answer the question, did you or did you not make that fleece out of kids

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

The only thing that stops a bad guys cum, is a good guys cum.

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

[in the voice of Piers Morgan] the union jack has bled away. it's black and white, and it's fuckin' gay

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

me: i gotta new idea for a game - undertale but with titty ninjas bethesda: please leave sir bethesda after i leave: fuck thats good

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments

when I run for office im gonna swear on a big ol' booty book, ooooooweeeee

submitted 380 days ago • 0 comments