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karlor.bsky.social
the line at the grocery store is a government psyop. references provided only in exchange for leniency i may or may not ruin music (thats right, all of it) here: https://bsky.app/profile/bug0ut.bsky.social
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Posts 29 Comments 21

I finally got it. Tim Pool is real life Dwight Schrute.

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

Thinking about how cool it would be if my fiancee drew blood for a living so I could walk into the room she's in and he like, "Well, well, well if it isn't my phlebottom bitch!"

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

The only thing missing from the rest of this job posting (which is formatted just like this) is a bullet stating, "Attention to detail is STRONGLY preferred." This is actually not uncommon.

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

It starts as a distant rumble, but as you near Vatican City, it becomes clear that what you hear is dozens of male voices rhythmically chanting "CONCLAVE CONCLAVE!" As St. Peter's Square comes into view, you bear witness: All 135 cardinals holding torches, arranged in a giant square formation...

submitted 38 days ago • 1 comment

now how am i supposed to get my super premium... *checks notes*... uh... black... uh... market... fentanyl-laced... uh... tyle... nol?

submitted 39 days ago • 0 comments

Show me where Joe Biden saved a whole 1/3 of the country from overdosing on fentanyl. I'll wait. You can't.

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

Quite simple, really. Roy Cohn's wretched soul got turned away at the gates of hell and needed a place to crash.

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

MAGA: Fully committed to making outrageously confident stupidity the US's main export. 👊🇺🇸🔥, etc, and so forth

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

If I had to spend 5 minutes in a room with JD Vance, I might just decide I've had enough of this shit world, too.

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

*grinding metal economy noises*

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

Because Jeff Bezos is so short and bald, he looks like a baby falling over in front of that space capsule and that makes it like 100x funnier.

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

Maybe it's just me, but I vaguely remember another incident where an elected official from the US went to South America regarding a cult...

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

Tired: You'll own nothing and you'll be happy Wired: You'll own nothing because you can't afford it

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

Is there a word or phrase for this? Recursive parody? Meta-caricature? Critical parodic mass? Full satirical burnout?

submitted 59 days ago • 0 comments

I saw someone way earlier today on here mention MAGA lamenting over "trans people playing disc golf" and I legit thought it was someone making a funny exaggeration about the kind of shit those people obsess over... ... but it was a real reference to a Fox News segment.

submitted 59 days ago • 0 comments

Donald Trump speedrunning Civ 8 (early build) and really gunning for that Dumbfuck Victory.

submitted 62 days ago • 0 comments

If Musk is a 9 on the "Sounds Like a Stumbling, Bumbling Moron When He Opens Dumbass Mouth" Scale, Scott Bessent ain't all that much better as a 6.

submitted 62 days ago • 0 comments

I wanna see Milo work one day at a factory with his soft ass hands and come back and tell me how fulfilled he feels and then watch his dumb face drop when I tell him, "Cool, but it wasn't enough to make rent and buy rice and beans - 30 more years oughtta do it."

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

If nations were people, Trump is turning the US into an image of himself: a universally hated asshole-bully who no one feels like they can trust & the only conceivable relationship with whom is one where you fear what he might do if you misstep - he calls this "loyalty." That or you're the enemy.

submitted 66 days ago • 0 comments

holy shit i think i get it now. i get what waltz was saying: "we're going to punch america so hard its going to light itself on fire." ... guys, i think it's gonna work!

submitted 67 days ago • 0 comments

No. He *liberated* us from our *income* ... ... 👊🇺🇸🔥

submitted 67 days ago • 0 comments

[dumb, obvious salary negotiation tips]... and that's the kind of advice I offer in my weekly newsletter. If you want to mainline it straight up your butthole, send me your email address and I'll shoot it right up there every Friday.

submitted 67 days ago • 0 comments

Donald Trump, Karoline Leavitt, Tom Homan - the three pillars of the Can't Say Words Good Foundation.

submitted 74 days ago • 0 comments

Tired: Lefty DEI (diversity, equity, inclusion) Wired: Righty DEI (dipshits, errand boys, illiterates)

submitted 76 days ago • 0 comments

So we're watching some true crime shit on YT & the dude does the usual kinda slick but also kinda corny transition to an ad for Better Help and the script is all, "Please seek professional help if you think you need it, " and being somber & reserved...

submitted 79 days ago • 1 comment

and if you mimimimi long enough into the abyss, the abyss will mimimimi back into you.

submitted 82 days ago • 0 comments

I like how he can't say words good. Very encouraging.

submitted 84 days ago • 2 comments

Little known fact: Baldur's "Gate" is just a low-key reference to the legendary Faerûnian explorer's butthole. That's right. They named a whole city after it.

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

I keep thinking about that one chick in the Jubilee thing with Sam Seder who was saying, "Isn't it good to have a cohesive, dominant culture?" and then thinking about how a standardized education system is maybe the closest thing to that that we have (had?). Yeah...

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments