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kellybirddc.bsky.social
31 posts 70 followers 45 following
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Posts 20 Comments 23

@eitmonline.bsky.social Jason Sudeikis also has no sense of smell.

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

I’m really trying to get the word out about Not Saying Things. Instead of saying things, you can just not say things and many still don’t know this

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

@eitmonline.bsky.social I’m getting this for Diane for Christmas. 😂

submitted 67 days ago • 0 comments

@eitmonline.bsky.social i’m picturing everyone driving to work this morning screaming “vasectomy!“ At the radio.

submitted 68 days ago • 0 comments

BREAKING: Herschel Walker remains hopeful for an ambassadorship to the state of Georgia.

submitted 74 days ago • 960 comments

This was posted on Reddit about an hour ago. 😳 Pretty much everyone is telling her to get as far away from him as possible immediately. This is terrifying, right? It looks like the precursor to a Dateline episode.

submitted 77 days ago • 3 comments

I'm slapping on so much Drakkar Noir tonight that the clocks are going to read 1995.

submitted 88 days ago • 26 comments

just fyi, women really aren’t that complicated. we just want to know that we matter. oh and make us laugh and help us clean up the occasional crime scene or whatever.

submitted 93 days ago • 3 comments

New record for how long adult siblings can go without arguing when staying together while one or more of them is sick: 6 days. (Could have gone longer, but sometimes people need to be called out for acting like a butthead.)

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

Day 5 of vacation, day 2 of being sick af, day 1 of bingeing Archer with my brother and eating Viva Burrito. At least it’s not Covid. #winning

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

If you go to a Wicked showing and start singing they should be allowed to beat you with popcorn bags. Them babies came to hear Ariana Grande and Cynthia Eviro, not Pam from the community theater troupe. GROW UP.

submitted 93 days ago • 748 comments

PLAN B IS STILL AVAILABLE ON AMAZON. STOCK UP FOR YOUR DAUGHTERS AND SISTERS. It has a four year shelflife.

submitted 95 days ago • 220 comments

My brother had bilateral cataract surgery yesterday. Watching him gradually regain his sight since then has been delightful and moving. He keeps saying how cute his dog is lol. He’s not wrong. 😍

submitted 94 days ago • 1 comment

Nobody: Me when I go to someone’s house and they have a dog:

submitted 96 days ago • 2 comments

@doordashsupport.bsky.social You guys need to come up with a way of differentiating orders between people with the same first name and last initial. This is the second time in a week that I’ve gotten the wrong order due to this exact situation.

submitted 98 days ago • 0 comments

Hey folks, sounds like some MAGA troll put my account in a block list that’s going around. Can you help spread the word and tell people to unblock me (and others) it may have happened to? Thanks. 💙

submitted 99 days ago • 54 comments

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer

submitted 101 days ago • 707 comments

As a menopausal women, I've decided to start tracking my "period" in my health app to screw up their data.

submitted 103 days ago • 757 comments

Earnest post, but: a thing I like here is it’s okay to have moments of happiness in public without being broadly scolded, and I believe that sustaining this kind of humanity will be very important as we resist fascism. We have to sustain each other. Making joy isn’t denial, it’s how we will survive

submitted 104 days ago • 4709 comments

for anyone trying to extricate yourself from the clutches of Amazon: bookstores make more than a third of their money between now & New Year’s, & most bookstores ship nationwide 💌

submitted 104 days ago • 336 comments