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markinternet.bsky.social
Former writer, editor, and artist at TV-VCR, PAPER MAG, and I WATCH STUFF. But my new thing is being a crap person.
235 posts 40 followers 57 following
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Posts 18 Comments 32

All I'm saying is that Jodie Foster probably doesn't differentiate between elected and unelected wielders of state power

submitted 20 days ago • 3 comments

Had M*A*S*H come out in 2008, we would have made Alan Alda get super ripped to play a different, separate Hawkeye.

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

Doctor, thinking: “Holy shit, I can’t believe I’m gonna give Pagliacci a vasectomy!”

submitted 31 days ago • 0 comments

Fraggle names are almost entirely great dog names. Everyone is sleeping on that.

submitted 32 days ago • 1 comment

So much funnier and crazier than a yes. “I mean, that sounds very me, so sure.”

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

Wes Anderson is working on a new screenplay!

submitted 33 days ago • 0 comments

Christ on the Crosses? Why Jesus Must Been Crucified Sandwich-Style

submitted 35 days ago • 0 comments

Released in 2001, Windows XP famously featured a desktop wallpaper of a spread-eagle Jenna Jameson.

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

I once bought a ‘70s erotic novel because the cover was just SHOVING IT IN HER ASS against a black backdrop. There’s a bit where it calls cash MONEY RECTANGLES, which I assume inspired George Lucas to call a die a CHANCE CUBE.

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

While it's a great loss, I can barely even mourn Lynch, per se. The guy lived his life like he wanted: somehow making whatever wild shit was in his brain, killing it, and smoking cigarettes the entire time. Doing that until 78 is more than anyone could hope for.

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

Surprising MAGA hasn’t adopted Archie Bunker as some sort of proto-Joker.

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 45 days ago • 43 comments

You can't just buy the glove and become a Freddy Krueger. There's actually a pretty intense vetting process.

submitted 45 days ago • 1 comment

Apex neolib, insulting dogshit on his way out. Would respect the commitment to the bit were he not just doing it like a dying pet doing its routine out of programmed habit.

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

Permed old lady at the laundromat with a vodka bottle of detergent is peak Greenpoint Polish.

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

Eh-aye music is somehow even stupider than art. I can imagine someone wanting their D&D character rendered in a style or whatever, but wanting to claim authorship and listen to a song based on typing in the gist of it is completely deranged.

submitted 48 days ago • 1 comment

It is time for Dave Foley to let the monkeys out.

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

I said how I was still writing my checks with the Mayan calendar year instead of the Gregorian, and it rightfully didn't land, so I'm saying it here as an anecdote instead of a joke.

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments