oafbear.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

The next pope has already been selected: 19-year-old tech wunderkind "Mega Dong"

submitted 15 hours ago • 12 comments

grown man who leans to the side when making a turn in mario kart

submitted 12 hours ago • 19 comments

ELON: (replying to picture comparing 90s Lara Croft’s breasts to current day Lara Croft’s breasts posted by account called Western_Gaming) Woke must be stopped. GRIMES: Elon please call me back. Your sickly child Morty Mechahitler got cut in half looking at a photo of a Cybertruck.

submitted 2 days ago • 21 comments

NEW — 19-year-old DOGE engineer Edward Coristine turns out to be the grandson of former KGB spy Valery Martynov, who played a role in a sprawling 1980s espionage saga. www.jacobsilverman.com/p/prominent-...

submitted 2 days ago • 510 comments

I bet E.T. shit in that closet

submitted 3 days ago • 5 comments

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

Just paid my taxes via X, the everything app, but it said my payment went to something called $GOVCOIN. I emailed the IRS for help but they replied with just a poop emoji

submitted 10 days ago • 151 comments

We sent off the older of our two boys to university yesterday. Got him settled in his dorm room and came home. It’s quiet without him and I miss him.

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

Clear-eyed, direct NYT op-ed by @jamellebouie.net using the kind of non-euphemistic language the headlines should embrace:

submitted 18 days ago • 49 comments

TIL that Canola is basically another name for what used to be called rapeseed and I imagine that rebranding meeting went something like this: Industry Person: But what could our new name be Branding Person: Here is the unabridged English dictionary. Choose literally any other word.

submitted 21 days ago • 57 comments

RFK Jr's head looks like it came off a Warhammer figure

submitted 25 days ago • 14 comments

i smell a pulitzer

submitted 27 days ago • 1098 comments

Put me in charge of designing CAPTCHA. I'll ask you to find all the sandwiches and it'll just be pictures of hotdogs. We'll find out who the robots are once and for all.

submitted 31 days ago • 23 comments

1932: A young couple goes hungry for weeks to afford a solid oak credenza. Something to pass down to their children, and their children’s children. A hope for the future. 2025: A young man named “Bunghole” vomits a Zyn pouch into the credenza’s top drawer before tossing it out a second-story window

submitted 32 days ago • 23 comments

And if you have a drinking problem or substance abuse issue and this inauguration has you cratering, please reach out to someone. Please take care of yourself or if you can't get in touch with someone who can help. Hell, message me and I will do what I can to get you to the right people.

submitted 34 days ago • 12 comments

depeche mode voice: your own. personal. computer.

submitted 34 days ago • 16 comments

DEM SENATOR: Well there’s always next time 😃 a hearty “good game” to my colleagues across the aisle as they shepherd our great nation in the spirit of collaboration and teamwork! 🦅🫡 REPUBLICAN SENATOR: Does anyone know when it’s technically legal for me to kill this [SLUR NO ONE HAS SAID SINCE 1889]

submitted 34 days ago • 22 comments

i want a drug that feels like seeing winamp visualizations for the first time

submitted 37 days ago • 15 comments

Reading replies (not my posts because they don’t get replies) makes one realize that a significant percentage of people have literally zero sense of humor.

submitted 39 days ago • 0 comments

I think instead of saying “namaste” at yoga we should say “ohhh BIG stretch” like we do with our pets

submitted 40 days ago • 41 comments

GOP members complaining about reduction of military standards while using a chart that misspells the word military!

submitted 39 days ago • 1868 comments

[parole hearing] OFFICER: do you think you are you rehabilitated? ME: I’d like to thi— OFFICER: please tell us ME: if I may con— OFFICER: go on ME: will you let me finish my sentence? OFFICER: you got it parole denied lol

submitted 41 days ago • 3 comments

gen x: i survived drinking from the garden hose millennials: i survived riding a razor scooter gen z: i survived growing up on social media gen alpha (controlling an ipad with their mind): i can’t read

submitted 42 days ago • 19 comments

Logging into your boyfriend’s YouTube on the big TV: For You: Medieval historian ranks stews in cinema Building a catapult with dirt from my yard Programming a robot to unwrap KIND Bars Petite woman can eat the hottest sauce in the world The real John Wick was an Irish milkman

submitted 44 days ago • 19 comments

Always know it's gonna snow because my knee starts to ache and my eyes become large and the light that you shine can't be seen

submitted 45 days ago • 16 comments

If you take the "c" and "x" off the ends of "cardboard box", you're left with a perfectly repeating ardbo-ardbo

submitted 47 days ago • 16 comments

This is brave, introspective and absolutely worth a read. Bravo!

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

I wrote some reflections on what I've learned in the five years since I quit drinking

submitted 49 days ago • 22 comments

The reason Silicon Valley is so powerful and annoying is because Oakland lost their sports teams. Without raider fans acting as an apex predator the nerds became too abundant

submitted 51 days ago • 216 comments