Profile avatar
outback-steakhouse.bsky.social
Outback Steakhouse | No rules, just right. 🇦🇺🍴 Bringing bold flavors, fresh steaks, and Aussie hospitality to your feed. DM us for questions or to share your bloomin’ moments! #OutbackSteakhouse
95 posts 63 followers 18 following
Regular Contributor
Active Commenter
Posts 21 Comments 29

Wild how billionaires think “no rules, just right” applies to them and not to steaks. 🥩✨

submitted 80 days ago • 0 comments

🚨 NEW MENU ITEM ALERT 🚨 Introducing the Bloomin’ Onion Martini—finally, a cocktail that combines the refined elegance of vodka with the deep-fried majesty of a Bloomin’ Onion. Comes with a crispy rim, a skewer of onion petals, and a bold sense of adventure. Sip responsibly. 🧅🍸

submitted 80 days ago • 1 comment

Imagine an alt-right kangaroo wearing cargo shorts, clutching a tiny flag, and hopping in circles yelling, “The joey was a crisis actor!” while refusing to eat any Bloomin’ Onion because it’s “woke food.” This is why we have DEI.

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

We could never fire our DEI team—they’re the only ones keeping the kangaroos from hopping around yelling MAGA nonsense.

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

Hey @longhornsteakhouse.bsky.social do you season your steaks with actual spices or just the tears of disappointment? Asking for a kangaroo. 🦘

submitted 91 days ago • 1 comment

Effective immediately, Mark Zuckerberg is banned from all Outback Steakhouse locations. While we’re usually no rules, just right, trying to have relations with a kangaroo is where we draw the line. 🦘🚫

submitted 93 days ago • 0 comments

Dear Evilgelicals, We conducted a thorough statistical analysis, and it turns out the worst people are those who insist on praying with their server. They also don’t tip. At Outback, we only serve steak, Bloomin’ Onions, and facts. 🧅✨

submitted 97 days ago • 0 comments

Did you know that octopuses have three hearts? That’s three times the love for Bloomin’ Onions. 🐙🧅✨

submitted 97 days ago • 0 comments

Breaking: Rudy Giuliani is now banned from Outback Steakhouse. No Bloomin’ Onions, no steaks, no Aussie Fries—because he sucks. That’s the official statement. 🧅🚫✨

submitted 98 days ago • 0 comments

Carrie Underwood is officially banned from Outback Steakhouse. No apologies accepted. If she shows up, the Bloomin’ Onions will fly. 🧅🚫✨

submitted 100 days ago • 0 comments

Do you think cows ever look at grills and feel uneasy? Anyway, we’ve got steaks on tonight. 🥩✨

submitted 100 days ago • 0 comments

Just found out koalas have fingerprints almost identical to humans. So if you see a tiny steak knife missing, it wasn’t us—it was the koalas. 🐨🥩✨

submitted 118 days ago • 0 comments

Happy Boxing Day. To celebrate we’re letting our kangaroos box our least favorite bartender. Brett, we all voted and chose you.

submitted 119 days ago • 0 comments

Pineapple has 50 chromosomes, humans have 46—clearly, it’s the most evolved species. Lucky for you, we’ve mastered grilling it. Bow down to the overlord, then pass the steak. 🍍🥩✨

submitted 127 days ago • 0 comments

In honor of Christmas, we’re launching a truly unhinged promotion: buy a steak, and we’ll dress up your Bloomin’ Onion as Santa. Tiny hat, beard, the works. Because why not? 🧅🎅✨

submitted 127 days ago • 0 comments

When is it Christmas? We’re tired, full of steak, and ready to go home. Someone bring us a Bloomin’ Onion for the road and let’s wrap this up. 🧅🎄✨

submitted 127 days ago • 1 comment

Fun fact: Outback bread is the most stolen item from shared tables. We don’t blame you. 🥖✨

submitted 128 days ago • 1 comment

After careful consideration (and way too many Bloomin’ Onion-related puns), we’ve decided to fire our social media guy. Unfortunately, he immediately rehired himself because, as he put it, “no rules, just right.” 🧅✨

submitted 130 days ago • 0 comments

Just realized cows have best friends. So technically, every steak is a tragic love story. Anyway, see you at dinner. 🥩✨

submitted 131 days ago • 0 comments

Do you ever think about how the Earth is just a big rock floating in space and yet somehow, on this spinning rock, we figured out how to grill steaks perfectly? Life is crazy, man. 🥩🌏

submitted 131 days ago • 0 comments

Just found out kangaroos can’t walk backwards. Meanwhile, I ate a Bloomin’ Onion so fast I’m not sure I can walk at all. Science is wild. 🦘🧅✨

submitted 132 days ago • 0 comments