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p2start.bsky.social
Dad, wannabe comedian/actor, hard-hat job haver.
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FUUUUUCK the LAPD

I can’t compete with this

Stacy Keach as Not Hans Gruber, clearly having the time of his life: remember the Alamo, Tex? ha ha HA (cocks pistol) well go 'head n call me Santa Anna Jean-Claude Van Damme as Johnny "Tex" Winchester: aven't you eard (producing much larger pistol) heveryting spiggerin texis. hyee aw

Bluesky 💁‍♂️

shoutout to future history teachers who will get very tired of the phrase "yes, it was actually that dumb"

the soparnos

Interview with Harvard's 2025 valedictorian, a Chinese national, while two American men fight over nothing in the background

AOC: The girls are fighting aren’t they

This is all very simple. Let the world's two biggest babies fight and visibly construct and build a world without them. Anybody who tries to welcome Elon Musk, the world's most preeminent ratfucker, into their political party should be put in a dog crate until 2029.

second best

I say this a lot but we are all so lucky this generation of fascists came of age on message boards and not stabbing people to death at close range in a trench while the world detonates endlessly around them

forcing JD Vance into the middle of this against his will is such an incredible bonus

This message brought to you by Harriet Tubman, an actual person who actually lived.

Elon and Trump pulling into separate Home Depot parking lots and tweeting “I’m here you fuckaas bitch”

frasier: niles did you see the world's two worst people are fighting? niles: i didn't know maris's mother was in town

Looks like he'll be wearing that kid everywhere he goes for the foreseeable future

this is like drake and kendrick lamar but they're both drake

I’m not putting anyone on a pedestal but at every opportunity to be a shithead who throws marginalized people under a bus this man chooses the opposite and he’s wildly popular because of it and I don’t understand what about that isn’t clicking for other dems

On Sunday, my friend, Jonathan Joss was murdered and it took me a minute to find the words... Like so many of our lives, Jonathan's existed at the powerful intersections of Indigeneity, queerness, visibility, and vulnerability. He was fierce, funny, flawed, and real in every way that mattered.

Happy Pride to these two

ME: yeah could i get the impossible burger with cheese. THE VIZIER WHO'S BEEN ADVISING ME: ahh, an excellent choice sire. an imitation of the genuine article. there are some "friends" of yours to whom it bears a passing similarity ME: you want anything VIZIER: [chuckles] what i want is of no import

I think we need to lay off Elon with the drugs. It's literally the only cool thing he's ever done

Hell yeah Ken, fuck that Hessla up!

Don’t let anyone tell you Pride isn’t political.

This is a euphemism for when a bunch of them fall down.

oh wow I had no idea Luigi Mangione was there holy crap

Ben Franklin would be on Pornhub within literal minutes.

every article about politics in every mainstream publication is flat out lying to you if it does not emphasize that our government has been taken over by freaks and lunatics

The BBC obtained a mobile phone that was smuggled out of North Korea. The level of control the regime holds over its citizens is shocking but not surprising.

Ms Rachel said actually no I will not shut up

this is a black eye delivered by someone who doesn’t know how to fight and can’t throw a punch and Stephen Miller’s wife just left him for Elon Musk also Stephen Miller is left handed probably unrelated

Oh hey

Crypto guy in 2014: Crypto will revolutionize finance and change how we interact with money Crypto in 2025:

I can’t wait to jack off vintage 2000s style: shamefully, in a space of my home known as “The Computer Room”

press play to enter my happy place

Night of the Wrong Wives