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parentball.bsky.social
Parenting humor. Assorted dumb jokes. Too many puns. Humor writing: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/authors/michael-ward & https://medium.com/@mikeward08 Building a game for parents: www.parentball.com (New season drops later in 2025) Just outside Boston.
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Not my usual choice for work background music, but it's a Dropkick Murphys morning for sure

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

6yo woke me up at 6:10 this morning (my weekly “sleep in” morning) to tell me excitedly that her iPad had 100% battery power. Of course, the reason it had 100% is because I had charged it last night so that she wouldn’t wake me up in the morning when it ran out. 🙃 #parenting

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

BREAKING TARIFFS NEWS: There will be an exception to the pause of the exception to the pause of the exception to the increase that was paused after the pause of the exception was paused with the exception of the pause on the pause of the exception to the pause in the increase that was paused for the

submitted 3 days ago • 6 comments

My kids complained about the length of the Passover Seder. So I noted that it was about half as long as the ones I had to go to when I was a kid, and then I remembered that my parents told me *the same thing*, and this, my friends, is Zeno’s Passoverdox. Somewhere, the first Seder is still going…

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

I had a joke about Prometheus, but I couldn’t get the de-livery

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

The only good thing that can be said about the last few months is that it should basically have been the equivalent of a mass vaccination against “imposter syndrome.” Like, if you have any doubt about your professional competence at this point, just turn on the fucking news, and you should be cured

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

6yo: Why was 6 afraid of 7? Me: Why? 6yo: Because 7 ate 9! 9yo: {tells long convoluted counter-textual story that a friend told him on the playground that seemingly exonerates 7 and portrays 6 as the bad guy} Kids are wild. #parenting

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

“Dad……do you think Thomas the Tank Engine could actually be a demon?” -9yo, unnervingly matter-of-factly

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

My wife, getting the kids to put on shoes and coats for school: What’s the forecast? Me, loading the dishwasher: It’s an attempt by meteorologists to predict what future weather will be in a particular place at a specific time, but that’s not important right now. #parenting

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

China has the chance to do the funniest thing right now (1,000,000% tariff on American electric cars)

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

One of the crazier things about sites like this is all of a sudden you start seeing multiple untethered references to something (today’s special: dire wolves!), and then you have to figure out why the hell everyone is suddenly making references to like “peanut butter wicker baskets” or something

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

Welp, it finally happened. I met the mom of one of 6yo’s classmates and talked with her for a good three minutes before she introduced herself as the grandma. That’s it. I’m done. Mentally, there’s no coming back from that. I had a good run though #parentihg

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

Parents, can we make lemonade out of these tariff lemons and all agree to no more birthday party goodie bags full of stupid plastic trinkets? We can just tell the kids, sorry, the president didn't think you should have them anymore

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

Five people injured in timely metaphor (I'm glad the injuries were minor) www.cnn.com/2025/04/07/t...

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

Took the kids to the local children's theater production of Percy Jackson & the Lightning Thief yesterday. In a quiet moment after a fight scene, 9yo says at full volume, "These fight scenes aren't realistic. I don't like them." Sheesh. Everyone's a critic. (He wasn't wrong, but still.) #parenting

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

Just want to send an appreciative shout-out to those of you still on twitter who continue to post screenshots of people there saying the absolute dumbest shit imaginable. Thank you for providing this service, so the rest of us never have to go back

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

thinking about the amount of context necessary to explain to someone from 2010 what people are protesting with signs reading "cheap eggs not measles" or "tax the rich, not the penguins"

submitted 11 days ago • 125 comments