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peachhen.bsky.social
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188 posts 20 followers 8 following
Prolific Poster

men will ignore all warning signs to do something they're not supposed to do and then blame you when they get hurt

i do not consent to my body growing these random skin tags

as a chronic jaw clencher i could never be trusted with a cyanide pill in a fake molar

i'm not listening to any of these recession rumours *deletes lip products from cart*

no man has ever once heard what i was saying to him while his phone was in his hand

just bought 2 mascaras that i hate so catch me with raccoon eyes for the next 4+ months

sisyphus and the water distiller

cereal is just kibble for humane

my roman empire is cryptic pregnancies

are you ugly at work/hot in your free time, or hot at work/ugly in your free time? just asking cuz i'm ugly at work/ugly in my free time so

it's just easier to carry the misinterpretations people have of me than to correct them

we need to invent a lie detector implant

men lie a lot. sometimes it's intentional because they are trying to be deceptive. but often it is an accident simply because they are stupid

english muffins can fuck off

groundbreaking new research shows the previously unrecognized presence of vestigial organ in human men: the brain

next step in human evolution is males having vestigial ears since they NEVER USE THEM

gonna start recording time lapse of any writing/typing to prove it wasn't done by ai

could go for some medieval torture right about now

why is mascara thirty dollars? mascara should always be $9.99

heal me seaweed snack

reading my emotional support fanfic

yearning for something that doesn't know i even exist

forlorn is such a good word

me after a stressful day: time to crack open a cold one *stabs bbt straw through cellophane seal*

we should be able to inflate our double chins like a frog

lost in my daily daydream of starting over in the english countryside as a minimalist

will i ever be acknowledged for how funny and beautiful i am

my chronic pain seems to be trying out a new trend called: different body part hurts every month for no reason surprise

as a cat owner of 12+ years i will still never get over the absolute epitome of cuteness that is when cats clean behind their ears

i really thought braces were like 20-30k for some reason. as valuable as my art degree cost

arthur h. ritis

getting abducted with a burlap sack over my head sounds really good right about now

between the canada post strike and american tariffs, i gotta start my xmas shopping now as a canadian smh

just realized i'm in an inter-abled relationship(brown eyes vs blue eyes)

laying in a hammock would fix me

sometimes you come across a man who is so insanely hot except he is taken and you are also taken and you both live in different countries and have nothing in common

i don't have fomo. i have fopo. fear of pissing off. please don't be mad. please don't be mad. please don't be mad.

yes i follow a 12 step program(bedtime routine)

need an at home x ray machine so i see what part of my body is acting like a little bitch

In honor of World Migratory Bird Day, fuck off and fly away from all the bullshit dragging you down.

ninja cremati

when my moms partner would piss me off i used to secretly occasionally pour out one of his cans of beer

baggus are overrated

unconditional love is the real cryptid

the true test of a relationship isn't traveling together, it's when you live together and one person is sick and the other isn't

thought about what necessities i would pack if i suddenly had to move abroad, and honestly not much besides my clothes/cat/tablet/makeup. maybe my favourite water bottle and slippers

i need to go to the uk so bad

i spontaneously decided to wear my headlamp while vacuuming/steam mopping and had a eureka moment