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philgibson01.bsky.social
If anyone wants to be friends in real-life, my user name is "Phil".
240 posts 265 followers 95 following
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I regret to inform you that I am back on my bullshit.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

@profanity.accountant go fuck yourself

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

[I get home to find a note on the refrigerator that says "I'm leaving and i'm taking the kids"] me: [unplugs fridge from power outlet] you're not going anywhere, you piece of shit

submitted 89 days ago • 19 comments

reaction gif of celebrity laughing is a reply without honor. do your own laughing coward

submitted 91 days ago • 18 comments

I've never heard his name out loud so is the A in JD Vance a short /æ/ like in "asshole", or a long /a:/ like in "arsehole"?

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Pancake on the streets of London. Pancake on the streets of Birmingham.

submitted 5 days ago • 5 comments

There I was having a lovely evening on the fjord with my pals, when Edvard suddenly goes "OK do a funny one" and I'm like "lol ok". Next thing you know he's gone and put that picture fucking everywhere, and now your face is symbolic of the agony of the human condition. FML.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

They should bring back Clap for Carers but for when I do a really good parallel park.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

That new Self Esteem song is subtle, but I think it might be about s*x. www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkLO...

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

Terrific thread, that will fire your brain up (in a way an LLM could never understand.)

submitted 9 days ago • 3 comments

Columbo: Just one more thing, Mr Joel... Billy Joel: What's that, Lieutenant? Columbo: I said there'd been a terrible murder...but I never said anything about a fire... Billy Joel: Oh shit!

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

Discovered recently that Master of Malt (my preferred whisky supplier) not only do gift vouchers, but that those vouchers accrue interest at 5%, which is a better rate than most savings accounts/ISAs. I should just ask my employer to pay me in MoM vouchers from now on.

submitted 11 days ago • 1 comment

Radio stations be all like "Answer your phone and shout 'Show me the money!' and you'll win 1 million pounds!" and it's like hold on a sec, answer the fucking what now? I am not doing that.

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

Might do a post. 🤔

submitted 13 days ago • 1 comment

Soooo (twirling pigtails) is there a Mrs Kipling?

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

They should make Mini Eggs but like, a larger version of Mini Eggs. Not too large mind you.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Hit the jackpot at Co-op earlier as a staff member brought out a trolley of fresh pastries to restock the hot cupboard. First on the scene, I thought. Got awkward when he was still arranging them 10 mins later, while I was still loitering nearby pretending like I wasn't waiting for him to finish.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Quite a few people yesterday said I'd taken Elon Musk's Nazi salute out of context so I've made a helpful context map

submitted 16 days ago • 9 comments

Back in the gym for the first time since September (thanks to work, then a knee injury, then illness, then illness again, then a foot injury, plus a couple of times it was just too cold and I didn't fancy it). Took it easy but still pleasantly surprised that I wasn't completely back to square one.

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

The next Bond movie will be titled "Time to Die Mister Bond, Handcrafted Artisanal Film Movie for Men – Perfecf Christmas Gift and Funny Realistic Spy Gag, Harmless Entertainment Prank for Kids and Adults, Realistic Vanilla Scent 7.9 Ounce Motion Picture (Pack of 1)"

submitted 17 days ago • 7 comments

[slipping Godstone sinkhole a tenner] Can you...you know...go any faster?

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

Bafta? I hardly know her!

submitted 21 days ago • 1 comment

Happy VD to all who celebrate.

submitted 23 days ago • 0 comments

IT'S MY WIIIIIIFE AND IT'S NOW OR NEVER I DON'T WANNA LIVE FOREVER I JUST WANNA BE YOUR VALENTINE IT'S MY WIFE Happy Valentine's Day, @llia.bsky.social

submitted 23 days ago • 0 comments

Was supposed to have PAT testing at work today but the guy didn't show up, so I guess I'll never know who the father of my work laptop is.

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

[to the tune of "In a Big Country" by Big Country] Eating Wheat Crunchies It's for my lunchie Like a lover's voice Far as the mountainsiiiiiiiiiide

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

Got a Pixel 9 Pro today and it is DESPERATE to get me using Gemini. Has anyone actually used it? I've spent the evening researching it and am yet to find any way in which it might be useful. Nothing it can do that I couldn't do in a couple of taps anyway, and I don't want to talk to my device.

submitted 26 days ago • 1 comment

submitted 26 days ago • 392 comments

THIS VERY LARGE ENVELOPE IS SENDING ME 🤣

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

“Beans r not woke. How could you do this?” has killed me

submitted 26 days ago • 7 comments

If only there was some event five years ago to learn from where the government of the day thought they knew better than experts, prioritised economic growth at any cost, and thought British exceptionalism would win the day despite alarm bells ringing across the world. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

How am i just now learning about the Spam folder. some great deals in here

submitted 28 days ago • 19 comments

Donation # 70 in the bag. At 100 I get to meet the Queen or something.

submitted 26 days ago • 1 comment

Buying a new phone should be an enjoyable experience, but when your old phone is busted and you suddenly HAVE to buy a new one it's actually kind of tedious and expensive.

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

Enjoying watching Jack Currie boss it at left back for Leyton Orient against City. One of the best players Wimbledon have produced in the last few years and by all accounts a lovely lad, great to see him doing well.

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

Listening to the Man U/Leicester match on the radio and the Old Trafford DJ blasting out "Glory Glory Man United" at the final whistle of a match that they made such hard work of, and scraped through with a dubious winner in the 93rd minute of, seems a bit...weird? Maybe wind your neck in a bit, DJ.

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

Just got pegged by my wife.

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

If that asteroid decides to hit Earth do you think we'll get a day off?

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

But isn't EVERY Winter Olympics event a sliding event in at least some sense? www.bbc.co.uk/sport/articl...

submitted 31 days ago • 1 comment