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princessofwhales2.bsky.social
@blockmeamadeus.bsky.social’s emotional support bitch I’ve gotten some more dollies since I was last here My posts and mine alone https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaaly7xox37os
2,889 posts 9,363 followers 371 following
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Posts 38 Comments 10

Why would you even show up to a gun fight i know i wouldn't

submitted 10 days ago • 10 comments

This post by @stuforreal.bsky.social was so good, @joparkerbear.bsky.social thought everyone should know! Go show them and their post some love!

submitted 6 days ago • 1 comment

I got that dog in me (I’m scared of the doorbell)

submitted 6 days ago • 67 comments

[me, being murdered] please make sure someone hot plays me in a dramatic recreation of my death on Unsolved Mysteries

submitted 6 days ago • 5 comments

Me, being devoured by a shark: Damn, I was really hoping to be here for the asteroid

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

someone replied to my diving board skeet yesterday saying i was acting too thirsty and i really hope they did not read every other skeet i have written

submitted 7 days ago • 6 comments

You could never steal my guitar because my guard is always watching 👀

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Made a comic of my daughter telling dad jokes

submitted 7 days ago • 2 comments

Pardon my cynicism, but I have a hard time believing the chocolate bars Cheryl from accounting is selling from a box for her kid's pee-wee football team are the "world's finest".

submitted 7 days ago • 69 comments

beaker on magazine covers: thread

submitted 7 days ago • 53 comments

Classics

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

I have a good sense of object permanence. I'm consistently saying no to everything.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Wanted something sweet so I popped some gummy vitamins instead of getting into the kids' valentine candy, this is a fitness account now

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Waiting for carry-out soup. This is it. The pinnacle of my very existence.

submitted 7 days ago • 6 comments

Something you should know about me is there's nothing you should know about me

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

i know you are but what am i doesn’t work as a comeback if you’re the one who does the insult first, js

submitted 7 days ago • 3 comments

Old men love telling people what “that building used to be”

submitted 7 days ago • 57 comments

Looks like I'm adding, "open bag of chips," to my emergency plan in case of a fire.

submitted 7 days ago • 18 comments

I’ve got to go do something else, but I just want to say that the basic bitch flu nearly killed my sister a few years ago. Like, emergent hospitalization, running all sorts of tests, needing so many fluids…and really the only thing they could do was keep an eye on her.

submitted 7 days ago • 4 comments

When that new Marvel movie comes out it’ll be “Dr. Doomscrolling” am I right kids?

submitted 7 days ago • 4 comments

Don't take flibgdorp it you are allergic to slipomonatosaurus

submitted 7 days ago • 4 comments

Disturbing if literal: jump their bones

submitted 7 days ago • 8 comments

If you see this, post a photo from your device, no explanation. [except, you know, in the alt text for the folks who need it]

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Everybody start making their leprechaun traps yet, or are you going to be caught with your pants down next month

submitted 7 days ago • 4 comments

I'm just glad my ego deficit isn't 402 billion dollars

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

We are out with our young friends and their toddler and I am sure people think we are the grandparents.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Pretty much every unprompted cleaning frenzy I go on begins with me dropping the cap to my weed device and ends with me finding it. No more cleaning than necessary, that's my motto

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

This is ours, mine, all of the targeting and attempted erasure of transgender people is one of my fights. No to divide/conquer for queers.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Luigi’s best chance at being acquitted is reasonable doubt Which we should all have because we all saw those photos they showed us and we all agreed before we knew who he was that they were not the same person Anyway, if you want to free Luigi, don’t presumptively assume guilt is all I’m saying

submitted 7 days ago • 9 comments

Mario moves to the country with a cloning machine. He's gonna have a lot of Peaches. Take that Bowser

submitted 7 days ago • 3 comments

Eating pizza from last night for lunch. Y’all should try this sometime.

submitted 7 days ago • 17 comments

it’s been twelve years since my wife and i bought the house i grew up in from my parents and i’m still afraid to touch the thermostat

submitted 7 days ago • 25 comments

Don’t tell anyone but I still use my library card from Colorado for Libby and I just had to verify it and I’ve never sweated so much in my life thinking they were going to deny me

submitted 7 days ago • 10 comments

The voices under the floorboards grow louder. Thankfully, I have my earbuds in, so I can't hear their tortured warnings. The world is on fire, but my sunglasses block out the bright lights. This is my fight song.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

after the fall we should rebuild a society where everyone communicates through trombone like charlie browns parents

submitted 7 days ago • 3 comments

wow, flowers are really cheap at the grocery store today, did something happen

submitted 7 days ago • 3 comments

. I've eaten so many Beyond Burgers™ in the last month I think I may have bypassed infinity.

submitted 7 days ago • 15 comments

Once upon a time there was a restaurant that my family frequented quite often. The big kick was that kids pay what they weigh. Hahaha now if that wasn't a fast track to my crippling low self-esteem, I don't know what is. Also, y'know asthma because smoking section

submitted 7 days ago • 4 comments