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sbutler87.bsky.social
She/Her,TD, Writer, Filmmaker living it up on the West Coast. In this house we love pickles (not a euphemism), Hanson, Sad Girl Music, TWDCaryl and reading fan fiction.
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One thing about this angel baby is that he is going to let me know he is royally pissed at me by peeing all over a piece of my clothing. But, by doing it only in secret so that I do not find it until the next morning when I want to put on a pair of sweatpants to lounge in. Love him.❤️

I am the gurl who comes home from work, ruminates on the state of the world, thinks about the continuing plot in her fanfiction and eats an entire jar of pickles. I contain multitudes.

Getting a compliment on a recent installment of my fanfic that says “this is beautiful, lovely, and hopeful” feels like drugs going into my veins.

Me when management comes to tell me they’re scaling back more production staff during my shift at the news machine but not scaling back live programming:

I read this to my partner and he asked, “did he really?” 🫠 we are officially in the age where we can’t tell what’s real from satire.

Every time I think I’m in the homestretch on this story…. Ooops… looks like I need to add another chapter. The discovery of it all is fun.

Kendrick’s American flag motif at THIS MOMENT is subversive. Yes, yes, yes.

When my partner of 14 years still sends me poems with ma “this reminds me of us” message and my stomach does a little flip. Me to myself: like…Yeah bitch you’re in love.

Oh wait… shit… you mean now that our pilot is done we have to let people read it? #Screenwriting

My boss asking me today if I was still recovering from the high stress of a tech hiccup situation at work last Friday. Me: have you seen the state of the world right now?

Things might be chaotic and awful but my writing partner and I finished the first complete draft of our work place comedy Pilot! #tvwriting

💯💅

Maybe the balm for what ails me is zombie apocalypse fan fiction.

Life is hard, the world feels dark AF. I think it’s ok if I give myself a little treat: farmers market sauerkraut.

Logged out of the bad place for good I think. I just can’t take the infighting, gaslighting and bad info being passed around in my fave fandom and ship. It’s making it difficult to enjoy when everyone is mudslinging and being drama queens.

Correction… 21 chapters?? I just came up with an idea for another one. Sweet lord. 🤦‍♀️

So this story is looking like it’s… checks notes… going to be 20 chapters. That’s… checks notes… five chapters and 40k more words than I originally wrote years ago. How? This was just supposed to be a fun little re-edit.

When it feels like your ship is never gonna sail off into the sunset… or zombie apocalypse.

“And the people bowed and prayed to the neon god they made”- All Delighted People by Sufjan Stevens

And just like that— 5 3/8ths pages of pure fluff written. Chefs kiss. Imposter syndrome can kindly go suck it.

Knee deep in another chapter and look who shows up. Imposter syndrome:

💯this

Things are about to become a mess in the US (tbh they already are) and I’m stuck working in news. So, I am trying to put a positive foot forward and just write… anything. As my husband put it: let’s just throw the world aside and do us.

Things are feeling extremely dystopian right now.

Trying to wake myself up enough to run robos for tonight’s 10pm newscast. The week finally caught up with me.

This last week has been exceptionally hard for so many humans and I just feel like a lot of people need to go touch some grass and remember their fave characters on tv are fictional… why are y’all online being ugly and fighting about them? Let me have my head-canons and fantasies in peace ok? Yeesh!

Went over to the bad place to look around. So much fighting over my fave ship. LOL’d at a tweet about Katy Perry. Closed the bad place and promptly opened my Spotify fanfic playlist and passed out for 15min during my break at work. dreamed about my fave ship slow dancing.

I’m just a girl, on standby until 3am, waiting for the next TD to arrive.

Exhausted. Things are calm enough right now that we were finally allowed to take a terminal break in our local news programming. Just waiting for next shift to arrive and I can go home. Strong winds incoming Sunday. We all better pray.

Just putting it out there that if you are looking for accurate, fact checked info about the fires outside of Watch Duty app, you need to get off social media and start watching LA local News. I’m seeing tons of misinformation and rumors on here, threads/FB and the bad place. #lafires

Writing officially on hold while I try to survive working through this fire coverage while also keeping an eye on the fire situation near our apt.

Made a “just packing up the car and taking everyone to work with me evacuation plan” for the fire closest to me. By close I mean 5 miles. Think it’s gonna be fine but you know how my anxiety loves to spiral out. That and working in news means I’ll eat drink sleep these fires until they’re out.

Things are on fire, it’s windy, the internet is out until further notice, husband is sick sigh the flu or something, I have to work tomorrow and I have writers block.

I’m nine pages into working on a chapter and just realized this is not the emotional tone I was going for. This has happened twice in the last three days. Oy.

Right now living in a smol 600sq ft apt with my partner and dog feels challenging. But someday soon I’m going to look back fondly at the nights where,I’d arrive home from my late shift at the news factory, shut myself in the bathroom, and write.

Did I accidentally write a novel? maybe. Is it technically a fanfic about my favorite ship? Yeah.

Working on three creative tasks simultaneously is daunting yet satisfying. My audhd brain is extremely pleased at the momentum occurring.

What do you do when the #TWDCaryl fic dries up? You spiral and watch fanvid edits mixed with TSwift music.

I’m in Japan right now so I’m obliged to remind the world — we don’t want AI. We want a robust rail system. We want trains. Metros. High speed. Locals. Cute trains. Efficient trains. Trains.

I am gonna write something that is such a slow burn and so romantic…

Watching “Meet Me In St. Louis” strictly for research purposes and not because I absolutely adore it.

I apologize to my friends and family for the lateness on their homemade gifts this year… I’d just rather be writing😬