Profile avatar
socialhazard.bsky.social
Bespoke Jackassery since 1978
50 posts 3 followers 13 following
Regular Contributor
Active Commenter
Posts 15 Comments 35

maybe we can distract all the maga's in government by pointing out that there's no white m&m

submitted 12 days ago • 10 comments

@clueheywood.bsky.social It’s nice having family that sorta gets you and what you’d appreciate as a Christmas gift.

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

genuinely wonder it must feel like to be Jake Paul right now a literal Arnold Schwarzenegger from The Running Man moment as everyone on earth roots for you to be beaten to death on live television

submitted 101 days ago • 26 comments

Evander Holyfield is still better than Tom Brady as a color guy.

submitted 101 days ago • 0 comments

Ok ok. Titles of unreleased Jimmy Buffet songs found in a secret vault. San Juan Polka Spiders in my Pina Colada Head Trauma Bahama Mama Sex in the Rum Tiki Outhouse Giant Burrito is Neat-O Tequila Shotgun

submitted 256 days ago • 1 comment

@johnmoe.bsky.social Do you remember this City Pages concert review? It took me AGES but I found it. It was my White Whale. web.archive.org/web/20180702...

submitted 256 days ago • 0 comments

A girl was born with a harmonica instead of vocal chords and when she cried it filled the room with a melody so sweet. “Make her cry more!” The villagers would shout. “Throw trash at her and lets jig, baby!” “HWAaangGG” she’d reply.

submitted 600 days ago • 7 comments

can: i eat that - a goat's autobiography

submitted 426 days ago • 7 comments

*To the tune of TMNT theme song* 🎵The Cat Hates Scarves And Now I'm Bleeding🎵

submitted 507 days ago • 0 comments

I’m watching the ‘Live’ action version of The Jungle Book and I don’t remember Baloo being so bitey with Mowgli. And who the hell cast DiCaprio as Mowgli anyway?

submitted 515 days ago • 0 comments

CSI - Who Are You CSI:Miami - Won't Get Fooled Again CSI: New York - Baba 'O Riley (????) The Seeker was RIGHT THERE you goddamn muppets!!!

submitted 515 days ago • 1 comment

I dunno. Getting jerked off by a vaping grandma while watching a production of Beetlejuice would be AT LEAST in the bottom 5 of my bucket list items.

submitted 528 days ago • 0 comments

This is belated, but these are my favorite Buffett songs of all time Son of a Son of a Sailor Fins A Pirate Looks at Forty My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don’t Love Jesus Shitfaced on the Riding Mower Dolphin Tartare Cabo Blowjob Fuck You Sammy Hagar

submitted 535 days ago • 0 comments

In 2002 the least probable future I could have imagined was "Sitting at home, 45 years old, stoned to the giraffe tits from edibles I purchased at the grocery store"

submitted 535 days ago • 0 comments

**takes giant bong rip** Man, I hope General Mills never makes Giant Bugles cuz my fingers don't know how to get any bigger.

submitted 535 days ago • 0 comments