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spamrisk.bsky.social
Views not my own. Everything posted is legally considered financial advice.
103 posts 25 followers 38 following
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Posts 47 Comments 3

How long can you exist in our society without ever going to a restaurant?

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

It’s A Wonderful Life but the bank is about to run out of Kohl’s Cash.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

I think it’s whack that Australia gets to live in tomorrow. America should make them be yesterday.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Expiration dates are a placebo.

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

Saw a cute ass hummingbird posted up on a tiny ass branch this morning in the rain. It was sick.

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

I wonder what kratom is like and whether or not I should ruin my life.

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

My life is like White Lotus (I shit on the floor and die).

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

I have no sense what my peers donate to charity and creators, but I’d really like to know. Am I giving KCRW enough? Too much?!

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

Talked to a recruiter today and asked her if she read or watched anything inspiring recently, and eventually came to reply that she listens to the Joe Rogan podcast the most. Anyway, I’m begging her for work.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

If BTS came out with a song called Skinny Puppy, industrial would have to move out of the way. We’d lose.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

I wonder what it’s like to mow a lawn. Wow.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

In America, when you have a loved one die, the people you spend the most time with will mostly wonder one thing: “when are they coming back to work?”

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Woke up this morning wondering why there were sales on chicken wings but egg prices were still insane. And then NPR had a story on why that was the case and it sucks 'cause I'd prefer to start an uninformed conspiracy theory.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Crazy this recruiter keeps canceling our meetings last minute. Doesn't she know I'm LinkedIn PREMIER?!

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

I love celebrity podcasts when they do ad reads for services to help people save money. I know you’re fine not cancelling those streaming services, homie. A real podcaster? Yeah, I believe they could use the scratch.

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

Just saw a coyote. Then walked three blocks and ran into animal control and narced on the coyote. Then they’re were like “well it’s no longer here not my problem” and drove off.

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

Poo-Pourri but it makes your shit smell even worse.

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

Just received an e-mail with the subject line "Pre-Order the Latest From Marcus Aurelius."

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

I’ve stained the stainless steel.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

With how easy it is for ten year olds to get Pokemon, it’s crazy there’s zero reported school violence in that universe. Like no one who ever didn’t study for a test would casually drop an Onyx in homeroom.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

Right now the best social media feeds are Venmo, Goodreads, and Bluesky in that order.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

We can’t put the genie back in the bottle. We can never uninvent the snooze button.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

If my house got egged these days, I would think that it was an insane display of wealth and power. Couldn't come back from that.

submitted 28 days ago • 0 comments

I, too, have banned links to Twitter.

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

I miss when the worst part about Facebook was Farmville.

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

The first time I watched Mulholland Drive, a woman explained it to me afterwards.

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

I like how hero shooters like Marvel Rivals always have a bunch of options of super fun and interesting DPS heroes, and then like four or five tank and support options and only two are meta.

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

Shoutout to the one dude I saw today wearing a mask under his nose. Your weird choice, your weird life.

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

One of my favorite parts of unemployment is watching my employed friends play Steam games during the weekday.

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

Huge shoutout to my IG acquaintance for posting an "I'm safe in LA, here's a picture of smoke" right into a "I made delicious tacos." Legendary sequence.

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

Honestly, I don't think anyone's prepared to hear "no" when they ask "is everything alright with you?" (This includes me, 100%.) But it's very humbling to be thought about.

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

Every time I eat asparagus I can’t wait to piss.

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

This Michael’s is way too crowded for 9:24am.

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

In my mind, Elizabeth II is still monarch and John Paul II still pope.

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

No, that’s my Addams Family–obsessed brother. I’m the wizard of ball pinning.

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

Stephen Merchant is in the MCU and I don't think he's said hello to any ladies there.

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

To anyone who has ever sung VNV with me while on the club dancefloor, no matter the circumstances, I would die for you.

submitted 55 days ago • 1 comment

Christmas is about buying Steam games. I've bought a bunch of regular dumb ones already, but is it time to buy a joke hentai game for $5 just to know what they're about? Like something shameful you'd have to appear offline to play.

submitted 56 days ago • 2 comments

Frantasia (it's like Fantasia but the Nanny). That anything?

submitted 56 days ago • 0 comments

Sick of being a consumer. I wanna be a shareholder.

submitted 57 days ago • 0 comments

How dare any shops, restaurants, or other entertainment establishments be closed this week. That is a right reserved for the noble people who spend their days sending emails and attending meetings.

submitted 59 days ago • 0 comments

How dare LinkedIn send me an email today. How dare they.

submitted 60 days ago • 0 comments

I like how certain things are just slightly more depraved when you do them on Christmas.

submitted 60 days ago • 0 comments

Imagine spending Christmas in the metaverse.

submitted 60 days ago • 0 comments

Merry Christmas to some and to most a good night.

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

Gen Z has no clue the pedestal America used to put sun-dried tomatoes on. Now you only see wet tomatoes.

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

I like looking around, seeing how popular violin music is in the mainstream, knowing how much violinists get paid, and still thinking, "yeah, I want to make my kid's life entirely about this shit."

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments