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whiskianwye.bsky.social
Literature bore Writer* Book merchant Photographer Jackass
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Alan Shearer’s (a very successful striker in British football) response to ‘Your celebration was the most BORING celebration of all time!’ being ‘Well, you have seen it 422 fucking times Is up there with my favourite off the cuff pithy witticisms that made me spit m’tea out

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Really wish that bullet didn’t miss. Absolute dire timeline.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

I had a dream last night that I had bought new underwear and they were really, really comfortable. Like super comfy. Cosy as fuck like. It was a great dream. Still beaming from it.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

To the writer who came up with ‘We’re getting fucked at a Diddy party and they’re making us buy the baby oil’ on the Daily Show, you owe me a cup of tea, you rascal.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Kinda mad that we bred wolves to be needy little bitches at 5am We did this to ourselves. Anyway she’s fine and sleeping again while I’m doing shit on Excel at 6am, just as god intended

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

I swear to god every cunt who exists decided it was a great day to come and boil my piss haha Some right specimens I’ve dealt with today. Ah well, least I met some good folk that evened it out! (Milo, Rome, Hessie, Clover, and Jet. Certified excellent peoples)

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

Sometimes I wanna be a DINK, but I don’t want to be living all like ‘fuck’s sake, this guy is using the kitchen again and is buttering the bread all wrong’ ‘Does not play well with others’ certainly was a damning observation Mrs Bishop made in my Year 3 school report.

submitted 11 days ago • 3 comments

Happy sixth birthday, Maizey.

submitted 15 days ago • 1 comment

To the lass who spent all night trying to get my cock I’m sorry you couldn’t take a hint but thanks for the compliment/sorry for your poor taste in men

submitted 16 days ago • 1 comment

Oh no. I’m old.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

The curse of my brain is that at any minute The Angry Beavers theme will play in my head and won’t leave for at least three hours.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Years ago I put off pursuing a career in journalism for the fear that I wasn’t smart enough

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

I really need a week of doing nothing with my brain and body in a warm climate next to a pool. But whenever I see the price of an all inclusive resort… Me: that looks relaxing Body: Oh hell yeah Brain: Or we could use that money towards hiking the Andes maybe? Me: Hmm Body: Oh for fuck’s sake

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

This is why I go online.

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

Richard Adams’ family estate should pay for my therapy

submitted 27 days ago • 1 comment

Day 19 of some more nonsense and daddy needs his bottle of Malbec and 3 hours of Ludovico Einaudi in the dark! Going forward, I might do Dry March instead of my customary Dry January. March is so delightfully uneventful.

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

Another champion morning! 06:30 - wake up and wait for alarm 07:30 - get out of bed and turn alarm off 07:32 - make a cuppa and down an Actimel 07:35 - have a fag and stare into the abyss 07:38 - Emails & shit 07:42 - Mai awakes: let her out for pee; brew another tea 08:00- have a cheeky poo

submitted 44 days ago • 1 comment

Who is your celebrity “Birthday Twin” (born same day as you)? Answer with pic or gif only.

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

Just noticed the trending ticker at the top. However it all seems to be American sports related for me up there, that I read LA Fires as a basketball team.

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments