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wstpitchbot.bsky.social
A parody of American soccer journalism and content creation. Have a tip? DMs open
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Might be the greatest opening in MLS podcast history @tombogert.bsky.social @empiregass.bsky.social @soccerwisehq.bsky.social streamable.com/6zq12w

Ivy League elite Jesse Marsch doesn’t believe a word he said, but in the narrative driven telenovela that is CONCACAF competition, he plays the part very well By: Alexi Lalas

Seattle Sounders resort to free ticket giveaway in shameless effort to generate authentic football atmosphere

This is a must-read but I’m disappointed Joe missed an obvious opportunity to point out how Jayden Nelson decoded MLS in no time after half a season of 2.Bundesliga tactical schooling.

MLS kicks off its 30th season today. The most successful & sustainable pro ⚽️ league in US history. A league whose academies identified & developed many of the European-based stars of the USMNT. A league that brought Messi to 🇺🇸. And yet a league responsible for the destruction of American soccer.

Felt cute, will probably delete

MLS season 30 starts this week. Here's a 🧵 of some things I created I hope you'll enjoy. I welcomed @paultenorio.bsky.social on the Concacast to ask about the biggest things happening on-field & off this year, plus reflected on the league's 30th birthday. youtu.be/-X-LUoiLcxI?...

BREAKING: Under Berhalter's leadership, Chicago Fire maintain perfect record of never winning competitive match against UEFA competition

ANALYSIS: Research confirms 100% of USWNT wins occur in tournaments we pretend don't exist

While European clubs simply sign players via economic levers, MLS teams spend day manipulating spreadsheets to comply with artificial roster restrictions

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take or something like that

While proper football cultures motivate players through relegation fears, MLS clubs forced to laminate website predictions. This is what happens in closed systems. #ProRelForUSA

Chalamet wearing vintage Crew gear proves MLS has always lacked authentic culture. A proper league would never change such a historically significant crest.

While fake journalists (like Ben Wright) are writing about the upcoming season, I am out here bringing you the coverage you deserve. Enjoy this exclusive interview with Tempo the Coyote. #EveryoneN

While proper football cultures play through all conditions, CONCACAF coincidentally postpones match featuring MLS's most valuable television property. Surely just weather-related.

It’s that time of year again where I’d like to you about the website I co-founded. It’s Subscriber Week at @fivestripefinal.bsky.social. Here’s why you should consider a subscription www.fivestripefinal.com/p/welcome-to...

MLS Kit Rankings | 17 Reasons Why No MLS Jersey Deserves To Be Called 'Best' In A Proper Football Culture

We just cleared 800 subs on the @mkickaround.bsky.social YouTube channel thanks to boost from @usltactics.com. A reminder that we're committed to covering American soccer stories all the way the pyramid so subscribe and help us grow the outlet. youtube.com/@morningkick...

In this terrifying time of original reporting, we at Men in Blazers believe the future of soccer journalism is democratizing other people's journalism. Subscribe to our newsletter for more. www.sportsbusinessjournal.com/Articles/202...

Why six different managers failing to start Gio Reyna actually proves he's too technical for modern football. Let's compare to the pro 🏀 career of Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf 🧵👇 By: USMNT STAN

On today’s video we discuss our entry into this year’s TST, and why our team losing would actually prove we're right about everything wrong with American soccer. By: Tactical Yanks

Somebody bring Gregg on for five minutes to do the most satisfying two-footed tackle of our lives

MLS In Shambles As USL Announces Theoretical Future Plans That Could Potentially Include Something That Might Be Pro/Rel

Despite ruthless performance in 22 goal rout vs USVI, MLS Academy products still missing critical character development that only relegation battles can provide. #ProRelForUSA

Sure, NISA and its clubs may have failed to pay referees, players and staff, but isn’t it the responsibly of the governing body to bail them out? How else can lower division clubs survive when they fall on hard times? #ProRelForUSA By: Ted Westervelt

It’s with a heavy heart that we share that our friend Joe Goldstein succumbed to his battle with brain cancer and passed away yesterday morning at the age of 39. Joe was a host on SR for 7 seasons and brought nothing but energy and insight to every show. We miss Joe very much. Love to his family.

While Tom Bogert and MLS shill media sip on celebrity tequila and look for the next Instagrammable branded selfie spot in their Coastal Cowgirl outfits at the Coachella Valley Invitational, we’re at home focused on the MLS stories that matter. Here’s where you can grab Messi’s favorite mate.

Why MLS’s convoluted, ever changing roster rules were a major reason in Sports Interactive’s decision to cancel Football Manager 2025

While we don’t agree with the jury’s decision, we’re proud that our frivolous lawsuit was responsible for the fall of Gulati, equal pay, the creation of USLSL, ending racism, curing cancer, and solving world hunger. We plan to appeal. - The Ghost of NASL.com

More or Less Soccer releases this year’s made up roster rules for plastic league that are sure to change part way through season. Here are our top 9 least favorites.

Justice? Hardly. Sure, it couldn’t guarantee a fully baked pro league by any measure, but NASL’s lawsuit exposes the sham of US Soccer’s “objective” league classification. The fix was always in. #ProRelforUSA

If CAN & MEX think the current political climate is making things too awkward to continue on as ‘26 World Cup DEI co-hosts, then the US could easily absorb all games scheduled in their nations. It’s time to stop these bad actors from taking advantage of the US and doing them favors By: Alexi Lalas

21 yo MLS lifer Jack McGlynn’s #USMNT career is over. By: 11Yanks

4 Reasons why Miguel Almiron returning to Atlanta United is a sign MLS is in decline

Here’s why RBNY is trying to replace John Tolkin “in the aggregate” and which one of the several left backs signed this preseason we think is the flat earther

MLS announces the league will now be half-assing its commitments in two cup competitions for the 2025 season.

Why MLS Production’s move to WWE’s brand-new, state-of-the-art production facility a sign that MLS is shifting towards “Welcome to Wrexham” style narrative driven content and a signal that #ProRelforUSA is on the horizon.

🫶 thank you to all who listen! Subscribe to @soccerwisehq.bsky.social … Apple: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/s... Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/3avVYlz... If you’re enjoying it, join our patreon for access to our discord, depth charts and more coming soon! www.patreon.com/Soccerwise

Chicago beat Sporting Kansas City 2-0, but what does it say about Berhalter that 3 months into the project with the Fire, his signature win is over a depleted SKC roster in a meaningless preseason friendly? h/t: @thotze.bsky.social

In related news, USL-C side New Mexico United has preemptively chosen to rebrand as New America United