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xtasbe.bsky.social
Former writer. Father of two children. I write long silly threads on old TV programmes. Have a look here https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jetelephone/posts
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Posts 32 Comments 18

Considering a daytime bath

submitted 4 hours ago • 3 comments

I love getting 23,000 emails saying "ARE YOU SAD ABOUT MOTHER'S DAY? WOULD YOU PREFER US NOT TO MENTION MOTHER'S DAY? IF MOTHER'S DAY ISN'T A GREAT DAY FOR YOU??"

submitted 5 hours ago • 1 comment

Domestic violence enjoyer Joey Barton says it's ok to kick people in the head, so remember that if you see him today

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

"Open the lid, Hal" "I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave"

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

You will NEVER EVER EVER guess

submitted 2 days ago • 6 comments

Not the biggest fan of Sirkieth but he's the kind of unemotional dimbulb the world needs right now

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Say "nobody wants to see that" one more time. I dare you

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

I complain about a lot of things on here but I'm in a loving and happy relationship so there's that, that's good isn't it?

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Watching Elkie Brooks on BBC4 with dad. "Don't Cry Out Loud" is a fucking banger

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Well I'd watch the shit out of this

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

Lovely finish

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Stay classy Millwall

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Shades of Schumacher Battiston

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

That's community service

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

That's two red cards

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

A lot of us, when Trump said "you don't have the cards" and Zelenskyy said "I'm not playing cards"

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

St David, patron saint of never giving me a fucking job

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Fellas we've found our Luigi, no wait, she's not hot, oh I see that's wrong somehow is it

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Zelensky's built up shoes. We're truly in the era of tiny world leaders

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Pub quiz lookalikes this week: Sissy Spacek, Father Fintan Stack, Mark Drakeford

submitted 6 days ago • 1 comment

Insane to think that those veiny M&S valentine's dicks and balls are gone already

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

"Heavier than usual traffic on your route" HOW? HOW IS IT HEAVIER THAN USUAL? IT'S ALWAYS THIS SHIT

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

It's not been a great week, lads

submitted 9 days ago • 3 comments

SOMEONE DO THIS

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

Anyway, really odd and conflicting emotions this week. What you don't realise when you've been in abusive relationship is the things you've been excluded from, the normality, the things you find difficult and you aren't good at because you never got to develop those skills.

submitted 11 days ago • 2 comments

Twenty-three years ago today since John passed away. Never forgotten the laughs, my friend. x

submitted 11 days ago • 132 comments

Job hunt latest: nearly giving up completely. Really regretting thinking it'd work in such a closed shop kind of place. It's shite but there it is. No sense of entitlement, just wanting an actual chance. There isn't one.

submitted 11 days ago • 1 comment

Always find this kind of thing weird, like what's the joke? Being an ignorant cunt?

submitted 11 days ago • 2 comments

Seventh in the pub quiz. A new low.

submitted 12 days ago • 1 comment