The reasons why they're actually bad had to lie low and marinate for a few years while the dumb chuds yelled themselves hoarse about the fact that it had girls in it
I have consistently been annoyed that there was never a good critical conversation about TLJ because the discourse stratified into Asshole Chuds versus everyone else
What l think may be true is that the people with legitimate issues with TLJ invested a lot of time into the extended universe stuff.
For people like me who mainly consumed the movies, it generally stands out as one of the best of the series.
Hard disagree. The lightspeed jump alone was Lore breaking. It just renders so many pass battles nonsensical. Why even build a Death Star when you can just strap a hyperdrive on an asteroid and achieve the same effect?
TLJ needed an environmental reason hyperdrive didn’t work there, also explaining why the First Order didn’t jump ahead and wait for the ships. Like it’s some kind of space badlands hence the hidden rebel base. Shades of the asteroid field from ESB perhaps, but could be done better than a rehash.
They had a hook they could have hung it on, whatever tracking was going could have made it possible. Or maybe the key to it is it only works against ships that have made the last 15 identical hyperspace jumps as you.
Just anything that would have been 'we set up a clever trap that only works here'
Oh totally fair and yeah it got poisoned with discourse. I liked it a lot upon rewatch but not at all in theaters so I’m never like “how dare you” about criticising it and also… it’s just a movie lol. Like it’s fun to hear other people’s opinions on why they loved or hated a movie
I felt this way about the Ghostbusters remake. The actresses had no chemistry. It felt like watching 4 stand-up comedians doing solo bits at each other, but there wasn't any room for that conversation what with the ongoing manbaby cataclysm. Then Shaun made a video about it and I was like THANK FUCK
My thought has always been that TLJ is a good movie on its own, but a terrible second movie of a trilogy. It does not pick up from the emotional beat of the preceding movie, and it leaves way too much to be resolved in the third movie. A reset to Zero was not the way to end it.
Finn and Rose's plot was potentially the most important plot point in the franchise. It's only pointless now, because Abrams apparently didn't even notice that it happened.
The original Ghostbusters was lightning in a bottle, capturing a bunch of people who knew improv comedy with their souls and letting them go on a script which should NEVER have worked.
But it did. It did so despite clearly having a visible weak link in Ernie Hudson's part of the script. (NOT HIM!)
i loved TLJ but i will concede that i have made a point of not watching it a second time for fear that whatever alchemy made it work for me in the theater will not replicate itself on the small screen
Rise of Skywalker, though, that one i've never watched and never will
That's right. There's nine films and that includes Rogue One. Fuck JJ Abrams. He had Rian Johnson set up some interesting plot strands for him and he threw those away in favour of the most boring fan service outcome.
He's got a hell of a long way on confidence and a pair of nerd glasses
Don't get me wrong, I respect what Johnson was trying to do, I just don't think he landed it (and there's an argument that it wasn't landable *because* it was wedged between JJs)
By the second time poe dameron is committing a mutiny, holdo shouldn't be patiently mentoring him, she should shoot him.
To be honest I almost think it was a mistake to have Poe turn out to not be dead, because they did absolutely nothing worth doing with him for the entire 2nd film.
It took until the 3rd film for us to get scenes with all three of them together at once. They REALLY needed to plan this out more.
like again, i'll concede that TLJ is not a perfect movie (the logistics of the side trip to the casino planet just do not make SENSE) but as noted it's impossible to really DISCUSS the movie because the chuds are the loudest voices against it
JJ Abrams is the king god of fan service. “The Death Star but more” is as creative as he’s ever been. It hit so fucking hard when I saw it but I was irritated by the plagiarism the second the credits rolled
It's very funny because the Expanded Universe novels did like a half dozen takes on "The Death Star but more" and everyone thought that was the cheesiest, most hackneyed shit ever, where was all this hype over the Sun Crusher?
My guess is that nobody paid $17 to read expanded universe content on an imax screen. I’m not saying they wouldn’t, I’m just saying it hasn’t happened yet
I'm going to take your point in the spirit it's given, but also say that a whole bunch of people paid brand new N64 prices to play Shadows of the Empire, a game based on an EU novel where an evil lizard mafia boss tries to use his pheromone powers on Leia to sleep with her
What I mean to say is that abrams wrote that screenplay for the people who only saw the movies (myself included). Without the broader frame of reference it’s just Death Star 3
In my defense, I didn't know about any of that, but there was a Hoth level, a total of 3 games for the N64 at launch, and a 90/100 score, so if course I dove into that stuff!
That was the specter of the what could be (Death Star II only blows up a Rebel cruiser in the last act). We actually see what Starkiller Base can do right off.
I almost turned it off when they did the briefing and we found out there's another motherfucking *trench run*.
I mean, I loved the
OG trench run, and the new one didn't completely suck, but for the love of gods, either make a str8up remake, or get some *new material*.
My only Star Wars take is (well, two, I also want a standalone Lando movie) is there needs to be a Trilogy in the style of Top Gun that's just about Wedge Antilles and Rogue Squadron
Obviously all the Wraiths and Rogues are great, but also just think how much we're missing out never getting to see somebody ham it up as Zsinj. Such a loss for the world.
I will accept no casting other than Brian Blessed, getting ever more hysterically flummoxed at the antics of the Wraiths and his plans getting foiled yet again.
To be honest, and this is just my personal exp, but as a one time military person, the hammy/jokey/slapstick stuff is actually literally how you live your life in that situation.
You see these people 18 hrs a day and sleep the other 6. If yall don't come up with jokes you'd go insane and die
I'm 5'8" my two best friends were both 6'4", we had a literal plan for if we ever got in a bad situation downtown - I would clasp my hands like a diver and they would throw me like a spear and then dive in, and after impact I would get up assess the situation, and dive in where needed.
Technically only the New Republic Capital system were blown up in TFA, it was TLJ that had the entire New Republic Fall... offsceen in the opening crawl so.. yeah super lame what a missed opportunity.
It seems like every single EU/Legends story was "Death Star III," "Luke/Han/Leia/their kids," and "Palpatine didn't die so Empire II." The sequel trilogy somehow managed to do all 3, and poorly. Luke, Han, and Leia should have been 1-2 scene cameos and focus on Rey, Poe, Finn, and Ben.
And it would have been so much better if Rey *wasn't* a Palpatine, because it turns the entire feature film into Skywalker vs. Palpatine Family Feud instead of a much bigger story.
Comments
I don’t like it but for other reasons dammit
For people like me who mainly consumed the movies, it generally stands out as one of the best of the series.
Just anything that would have been 'we set up a clever trap that only works here'
It was Finn and Rose and Poe's stuff I didn't care for, but only because they basically accomplished Jack Shit throughout the entire fucking film.
Finn and Rose's plot was potentially the most important plot point in the franchise. It's only pointless now, because Abrams apparently didn't even notice that it happened.
It sucks because Paul Feig didn’t understand what made ghostbusters work, not the actors.
But it did. It did so despite clearly having a visible weak link in Ernie Hudson's part of the script. (NOT HIM!)
("Dracula: Dead and Loving It", with Mel Brooks)
Rise of Skywalker, though, that one i've never watched and never will
He's got a hell of a long way on confidence and a pair of nerd glasses
By the second time poe dameron is committing a mutiny, holdo shouldn't be patiently mentoring him, she should shoot him.
It took until the 3rd film for us to get scenes with all three of them together at once. They REALLY needed to plan this out more.
Future JJ: Hold my beer. What if there’s 1000 Star Destroyers and they all have Death Star guns?
I mean, I loved the
OG trench run, and the new one didn't completely suck, but for the love of gods, either make a str8up remake, or get some *new material*.
yub yub, commander
You see these people 18 hrs a day and sleep the other 6. If yall don't come up with jokes you'd go insane and die
And then Han showed up
The only person less thrilled with his presence was probably Harrison Ford
Plus I hoped Finn and Poe would fuck.