aligarchy.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

did we really need to invent gogurt? is regular yogurt not already portable enough?

submitted 8 days ago • 18 comments

condensation is so pathetic like WHAT are u crying about u are a GLASS

submitted 3 days ago • 6 comments

wow,,,,, beautiful

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

punts your phone into a river GEMINI SEASONNNN

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

turned 37 today which, in los angeles, qualifies me for a senior discount

submitted 7 days ago • 8 comments

every painting from the 1800s is like ok girl get them titties out

submitted 10 days ago • 4 comments

when i say i’m enjoying a tv series and the person i’m talking to is like ‘you should read the books next’ it’s like sorry i’m watching 18 hours of television a day when would i possibly have time for a book

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

sorry i’m late bro there were enemies nearby and i couldn’t fast travel

submitted 16 days ago • 6 comments

happy mother's day to the woman who will still swaddle me upon request

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

look when it comes to sailor moon personally i would not be jazzed if my life were in danger and a masked tuxedo man in a cape and top hat showed up throwing flowers and reciting poetry

submitted 25 days ago • 1 comment

chicago deep dish ass pope

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

as kids my sister & i would annoy each other so badly in the car & it'd piss my mom off. she'd go 'GIRLS ENOUGH! Hands in your laps & look out your windows' & we'd be like jeez whats her deal. & now that i think about it it was prob bc our idea of 'joking around' was unbuckling each others seatbelts

submitted 28 days ago • 0 comments

sometimes art just speaks to you

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

boy are you an elevator because you have 2500 lbs of load permit-- you know what no. i'm not going to do this. i'm better than this

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

my bf [lying to his friends about why my arm is in a sling]: uhh she's fine she just fell-- me [being brave]: i was trying to rip a peach along its butt crease with my bare hands and banged my elbow against the desk so hard it made me cry

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

inside me are two prebiotic sodas, locked in a battle for my gut health. they will both kill me

submitted 47 days ago • 1 comment

this tomato has someone else's fingerprint pressed into it and i know it's someone else's because i put MY fingerprint against it and it didn't unlock

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

ME: where's that show STREAMING PLATFORM: ? ME: the show i've been bingeing for days? SP: ?? ME: the show i've spent the last 40 hours watching SP: ??? ME: i just want to resume watching that show SP: UGH omg then go type it in the search letter by letter with your remote what am i your mommy

submitted 48 days ago • 8 comments

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

GOD: heaven or ghost? ME: gee idk do i wanna float around in ur lame cloud or do i wanna spend eternity scaring people in their bathrooms

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

my dad saw a minivan and called it a 'catholic sports car'

submitted 51 days ago • 1 comment

was smearing lambs' blood all over my door when one of my neighbors wished me a happy passover and i was like wait what

submitted 54 days ago • 1 comment

How Stella Got Her Grooved Back (osteoporosis)

submitted 59 days ago • 0 comments

another day, another pair of crumbled undies found in my pant leg after i've already left the house

submitted 62 days ago • 1 comment

idk why it's so funny to me that pilates is just named after the dude who invented it: Joseph Pilates. it'd be like if the guy who came up with pickleball was named Brian Pickleball

submitted 79 days ago • 2 comments

favorite pastimes include: 1. yelling SHUT THE FUCK UP out my window to anything that makes any bit of noise whatsoever end of list

submitted 79 days ago • 0 comments

them, uninformed chud: wraps always fall apart when you put them down me, innovative genius: oh do they

submitted 85 days ago • 3 comments

it's called an oedipal complex maybe you've freud of it

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

wish the guy i used to like would text me already so he could see how not interested in him i am anymore

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments

"I know I am, but what are you?" - Socratease