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coffinflops.bsky.social
Fire swamp trash animal.
119 posts 74 followers 107 following
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Posts 24 Comments 25

Seen in a rest stop bathroom. Someone was obviously trying to change their identify.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Wow cool. The Catholics have a new person to tell them what to do. Can we move on now?

submitted 42 days ago • 1 comment

Had a dream where I went to “metal school” and the teacher played guitar and screamed the whole lecture. No one could understand a thing.

submitted 46 days ago • 0 comments

If your pets had to go to high school, which clique would they belong to?

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

The smoke they use to signal the new pope is actually the old pope getting nice and crispy.

submitted 60 days ago • 0 comments

Rodney Anonymous is Philly’s Jello Biafra.

submitted 62 days ago • 1 comment

I see some honeys tonight that should be having my rabies. Rabies.

submitted 63 days ago • 0 comments

Cheez Whiz is short for Cheese Wizard.

submitted 77 days ago • 0 comments

What the hell is this Groupon for?

submitted 87 days ago • 0 comments

Mammoth Grindr is a hook-up app for gay Mammoths.

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

Getting in my Time Machine to diddle some people.

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments

Why can’t we have a good old conspiracy about ancient aliens and lizard people without becoming anti-Semitic fascists?

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

I'm like a bird, I'm gonna fly away, Take the head off of a rodent, Put the rest on a honey-locust...

submitted 100 days ago • 0 comments

Everyday I play this game with my cat called "Is He Sitting or About to Piss on the Couch"?

submitted 100 days ago • 1 comment

Hey Bluesky, I'll be in Houston, TX next week. What things should I do? Where should I eat? What's cool?

submitted 101 days ago • 1 comment

Me watching Alone while eating snacks and drinking copious seltzers: “Ha! What an idiot! I would’ve done that differently.”

submitted 102 days ago • 0 comments

Do you have any book recommendations on how capitalism and fascism go hand-in-hand? Essays would work too.

submitted 107 days ago • 0 comments

My brand of petty is I’m willing to get run over when a giant vanity truck honks at me on my bike.

submitted 109 days ago • 0 comments

If you listen to enough metal with songs names like “Masticated Inurnment of Dysphagiatic Soils” and “Realized Abolition of Ocular Faculae”, then they eventually send you a medical degree in the mail.

submitted 109 days ago • 0 comments

Watching Mark Zuckerberg fall over himself to prove he’s also fashy reminds me of the guy in Come and See who really wants to be a Nazi.

submitted 120 days ago • 1 comment

Thinking about the Super Bowl ad where they said companies want to keep us sick and miserable only to sell us some fucking online pharmacy. I came this close to rioting.

submitted 123 days ago • 0 comments

Someone started an Eagles chant in the goth club and it felt like I was back in high school.

submitted 125 days ago • 0 comments

When getting into a band with a bunch of albums already, do you start at the beginning of their discography? Or do you start at the latest thing they've released and work your way backwards?

submitted 126 days ago • 1 comment

Tech in America: hey I made this thing. It’s just a prototype and I have no idea what the unintended consequences might be, lol. Capitalist in America: Cool! Let’s make it run the government, our cars and our financial system!

submitted 128 days ago • 0 comments