cypherstate.bsky.social
Jay ☆ 30s ☆ they/them
Bangtan OT7 since 2014
This is a BTS fan account, but I like all kinds of music! Autistic disabled queer leftist. White, Jewish, pro-Palestine. Some political posts. Let's try to make this space positive and thoughtful 💜
815 posts
198 followers
95 following
Regular Contributor
Active Commenter
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I'm glad we could hear each other even if we don't agree, I appreciate you taking the time to respond. There are many different perspectives on this kind of thing, and it's also quite hard to put the issues into words, so if we talk about it openly I think that's a good thing!
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I mean, seriously!?
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It does! It feels like you'd have to be so strongly embedded in a narrow way of seeing the world to actually be right there in the real place with real people breathing the air (you know how when you travel and you feel the 'air' is different) and still be projecting clichés over the experience.
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🥺🥺🥺 just imagine... the amount they've grown both professionally and personally is immense. Especially Jin, he's been on such a journey over the years... I'm sure the present day would all seem like a strange sparkling dream to their debut selves!
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I hope this doesn't come across with the wrong tone, I'm not trying to attack you and I hope we can have a real conversation rather than an argument. However I also feel your comments so far struck the wrong tone, so I'm attempting to explain why that is. I hope you can understand my intentions.
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In the end Soch is the one who was there & is describing genuine experiences and feelings. Also she didn't jump down the friend's throat! She was gracious about the discomfort in person & saved her feelings to share here anonymously. It doesn't seem fair to reject her experience & make assumptions.
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Of course we all have to start somewhere when learning about culture, but that's not an excuse for complete ignorance as an adult... However I agree it's positive the friend chose to travel in the first place, and I hope this experience did start to open her mind, this isn't about demonizing her.
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Secondly it's one thing to not know much about Korea outside of k-drama as a first-time tourist, but it's different to *actually* expect Korea to be like a k-drama! That shows a lot of ignorance. It's easy to just be open-minded to new experiences and not expect a whole culture to fit into a cliché.
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This is a frustrating reaction. First of all you have no reason to "find it hard to believe this characterization" of someone you've never met. Undermining Soch's experience, assuming she was being oversensitive and unreasonable with no evidence, and calling her "sanctimonious" is pretty rude!
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Anyway, sorry for jumping in with all that. As a white person I don't want to be speaking outside my lane, but I also think this stuff needs to be talked about more. I have many positive things to say about our community, but I also think we need to be self-critical so we can keep improving!
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Not to mention some genuinely xenophobic comments I've seen at times about BTS being "too good for Korea" when they're being mistreated by particular entities. The mistreatment is real and the frustration is valid, but the comments are not. Things can get downright ignorant in some corners.
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I see this sometimes when people in our fandom discuss issues around BTS, even serious issues like media manipulation, enlistment etc. but they frame the conversation as if this is THE most (or only!) important news story in all of Korea right now, and everyone must be involved and paying attention.
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To put it simply: South Korea is a whole country with 50 million people and a very rich complex culture & history. K-pop is not the centre of Korean culture. BTS is not the centre of Korean culture. Of course there's some significance there, but it's just one small detail in an enormous painting.
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I wish there was a way to have more ongoing conversations about this kind of thing in ARMY spaces, because this broader issue is one of my biggest frustrations about our community (not so much on bsky but in general), and I see it rear its head (subtly and not-so-subtly) too often.
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This is so frustrating, I can see why it bothered you. On the surface it might seem minor (which makes it hard to bring up without the person getting offended) but in fact there are many layers of broader ignorance required for her to get there, so the small comments say something bigger.
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if you have a D senator, take 1 minute to call. you can be quick.
“senator _____ must to raise a point of order on the floor & challenge budget section 71114's anti-trans medicaid ban."
want to say more? last week’s D all-star ran an explicitly pro trans care campaign! it's not a losing issue! ⬇️🧵
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Even if the exercise seems kind of weird, and even if it doesn't immediately change how you feel about yourself, I find it can be helpful to get these thoughts outside your brain to start looking at them from a different perspective (and be able to put them away). Hope that's some kind of help 💜
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It can be really (really!!) hard to truly feel compassion for yourself, it takes a lot of practice and you might have to work around deep-rooted negative messages. That's why personally I find it helpful (in the short term) to sit outside myself and try to have compassion for my 'friend'. +
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While holding that caring/defensive feeling in you, write down your answers to those negative thoughts (again as if you were writing about a friend not yourself). Both logically debunking the negativity, adding a more positive way of looking at it, and giving warm words to your 'friend'. +
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One thing that might help is to actually write out the negative thoughts (unfiltered) and look at them on the page. Then imagine this is being said by a friend or someone you care about, and how you'd feel about that, how you'd want to defend them, how much easier it would be to find the positive. +
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It really does!! Oh Kim Daily how I missed you 😭
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In my opinion it's not worth the environmental impact or the normalisation... we need to keep zero tolerance for Gen AI, because one person's "well it's ok in this context, I can make exceptions" becomes someone else's "it's not a big deal in general, people don't care that much."
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Thanks! Work experience is a great place to start if you can. My best tip is to be *confident* and take full advantage of your time. Networking is key! I was working 10-15 years ago now, but feel free to DM if you have questions (as long as you don't mind me being slow to reply sometimes 💜)
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Encouraging people is SO much more effective than scolding them! I'm a loyal ARMY, but I'm here to have fun and make my life better. If people make supporting BTS into a chore and a drag then it's much harder to get motivated. We should be supporting each other and doing this for fun!
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Babies! Best friends!
"We always got into trouble together"
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Full disclosure I'm only halfway through, so
a) idk if it remains unproblematic till the end
b) no spoilers please!