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flups.bsky.social
50% fat, 30% bosoms, 20% muppet.
3,241 posts 3,997 followers 275 following
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Posts 11 Comments 39

WORD OF THE DAY. Exit. Former scary clown.

submitted 51 minutes ago • 0 comments

This last week has been like the end of Wayne’s World with everything going tits up, causing me a metric shit tonne of stress. I’d very much like to end the week on a positive note so if you could get Greg Davies to ask me out to dinner, I’d appreciate it.

submitted 2 hours ago • 4 comments

TIMELINE CLEANSE! One week old Milton/Mildred.

submitted 2 hours ago • 3 comments

At first, Jean-Michel Jarre found therapy difficult. However, after being run under the hot tap he soon opened up.

submitted 3 hours ago • 9 comments

Set list: - Born In The U.S.Hey Jude - Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Dancing In The Dark - Streets Of Philadelphia, There and Everywhere -Help! I’m On Fire.

submitted 6 hours ago • 1 comment

Warwick is lovely but it’s not *that* exciting.

submitted 6 hours ago • 3 comments

Whilst driving home yesterday, the sky was full of scary looking clouds. I questioned whether they were a sign of an impending apocalypse and Middledaught said “I hope so, the world is shite”. It’s heartbreaking that at only eighteen, she believes the world ending is the best option available.

submitted 9 hours ago • 10 comments

And lo, did the universe look down upon the fat muppet and decide that she had not endured enough utter bollocks during the last week and so verily did make someone reverse at speed off their drive without looking and hit her car whilst she was on the way to work this very morn.

submitted 20 hours ago • 16 comments

My TL is awash with Trump and Musk. It’s effectively the aroma of a teenage boy’s bedroom.

submitted 2 days ago • 14 comments

AMUSE your offspring during a power cut by continually asking them to make you a cup of tea and put the telly on.

submitted 2 days ago • 3 comments

I have just weighed myself and have lost…two whole stone and five whole pounds of the three stone I put on after Christmas. Another two and a half to go until I feel moderately happy with how less fat I am.

submitted 2 days ago • 31 comments