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futurecringe.bsky.social
Merging quarter life crisis into midlife crisis. Loving literature and non-fiction equally. Much better in person than online. Fiercely cynical outwardly as a defense and cure for the uncomfortable truth that everything happens how it will.
122 posts 23 followers 37 following
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If you post on Facebook that you put on 7 sprays cologne minimum they might charge you with murder for when someone dies of a heart attack. Post responsibly.

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

I have a right to say stupid shit online and then block anyone who calls me out for saying you can’t update an IPad without a computer. -real, actual Bluesky users

submitted 76 days ago • 0 comments

Everyone I meet in person loves me because my online presence is my picture of Dorian Gray -every asshole online ever including myself (but I’m also just legit bad at posting).

submitted 76 days ago • 0 comments

Seeing a lot more half-famous people restricting replies on here and it’s just a reminder that everyone feels so entitled to their dopamine now they can’t even be bothered to interact with the digital proletariat in any way. Funny how that works even when the stakes are literally nothing.

submitted 80 days ago • 0 comments

We’re going to be doing DEI for guys with 80’s slickback hair. They’ve been treated very unfairly over the last 30 years.

submitted 82 days ago • 0 comments

It helps to think of them less as people and more as brands. Once their morality has been bankrupted they are propped up by name recognition and venture capital much like Chuck E Cheese. Staffers largely do the work and all they have to do is not fumble the bag when they talk in public.

submitted 83 days ago • 0 comments

Has anyone ever met one of the middlemen the podcast advertisers cut out? What were they like? Why do all those products end up at Target and is that not a middleman? They sell me on the direct to me model as better for everyone and then boom, middleman.

submitted 91 days ago • 0 comments

Many people don’t know the CR includes a prohibition on sales of athletic shorts to anyone who’s ever had a near death experience and used it as an excuse for their dumb decisions for the rest of their life. @fetterman.senate.gov

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

If you call Fetterman tell him there’s a provision in the CR eliminating Finish Line’s annual BOGO on athletic shorts.

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

They’ve been trained to be this way by their hyper-online, high-information, “I am very smart” voting base. If you don’t take anything but 100% as a win everything in politics is a loss. Repubs will crow about getting 5%, claim it as total victory, and gain voters tired of losing for it.

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

I’m not one to donate to politicians and it looks like there’s even less reason to start now. If you’re one of the people who does, may I suggest taking that money and giving it to someone who needs it directly instead? Believe it or not, we can try to care for one another. Check on your neighbors.

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

Everyone making a plan like dying quickly wouldn’t be the most pleasant option. Go ahead and zombie proof the prison, I’ll be right behind you, no don’t wait up.

submitted 95 days ago • 0 comments

I used to worry about what would happen to me but then I realized everything was me so now I worry about what’s going to happen to me.

submitted 96 days ago • 0 comments

It’d be a lot cooler if more of you identified as “worker”. Idk if this is surprising to anyone but making you think you need to be unique to be special is how they keep you from organizing, seeing others as equals, and taking collective action. You’re special enough if you have each others’ back.

submitted 100 days ago • 0 comments

I’m so emotionally intelligent I say stuff I know people want to read online even if it’s literally making people worse at interacting with each other in real life. -possibly you?

submitted 106 days ago • 0 comments

The point seems to be that you think you can call people hypocrites and it changes their mind but it turns out that’s not a very effective communication strategy. One might even say mocking reveals a deep-seated hatred below your performative “empathy”.

submitted 106 days ago • 0 comments

He doesn’t run away from a chance at media coverage. What are they going to feel bad that the dems aren’t there? Ooh I know they’ll give equal coverage to the empty chairs instead of showing literally everyone in the house applauding. Taking your unpopular ball home isn’t strategy it’s cowardice.

submitted 106 days ago • 0 comments

Big brain Blue Boyz: Dems should try making a principled stand in a way that media will be able to easily ignore. That should shame them into changing their ways. You will never win another election where real people vote thinking like this.

submitted 106 days ago • 0 comments

Shit like this is why democrats lost the Midwest. Yeah, it looks really tough to run away. Pathetic.

submitted 106 days ago • 1 comment

When people look at our era of history they’re going to be really proud of the way Silicon Valley took the idea of making everything worse and more expensive at the same time and added a subscription model to it.

submitted 111 days ago • 0 comments

There are people who will say shit like “well I had to (insert bad situation) and I turned out just fine so why is anyone complaining about (bad situation)” and they don’t understand them saying that is actually evidence they aren’t just fine.

submitted 111 days ago • 0 comments

Maybe calling people who believe stuff that isn’t true “stupid” instead of treating them with the same grace we would offer ourselves if we were mistaken isn’t a viable political strategy? Who knows though let’s keep doing that and using broad generalizations instead of personal stories.

submitted 119 days ago • 0 comments