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jacobmendelsohn.bsky.social
Liberal Jew Cub fan. Not sure which has brought me more misery. Also writer, misery TBA on that one. Torontonian by birth, Chicagoan by upbringing, New Yorker by design. Never threw anyone into a gulag.
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Prolific Poster

bc the social media echo chamber has become even more toxic than normal and bc I'm finally gonna read Ulysses and bc I want to start my new novel, I'll will be leaving social media until 2 of the 4 conditions are met: 1. Read Ulysses 2. 200 hours worked on novel. 3. Peace on Earth. 4. 1st book sold.

I often have to remind myself while speaking with another person not to make it about myself, especially when the other person is talking about death.

Film Forum really needs to stop making offers I cannot refuse.

OH COME ON!!!

For NYC mayor, my No. 1 is Brad Lander. I don’t know the rest yet. I know who I’m NOT voting for so that’s easy. Ranking the rest…ah, crazy ass democracy!!

The closing number of Act I of my Trump: The Musical will be entitled: "Tomorrow Belongs to Pee." See y'all tomorrow.

Last week someone said to me, "Reading and writing, man those are lost arts." No, they are not arts. They are habits, pastimes, hobbies. Most of us possess the rudimentary skills, we simply don't employ them beyond 240 characters of meme filled BS that drain our attention spans. Like this, I guess.

2016 taught me I have to keep my emotions in check when it comes to Il Douche aka Don Cheeto aka Lady Marmalade. But of late i feel less a modern day stoic and more a stone cold Vulcan with icy green blood in my veins. And yeah, sometimes I just wanna scream. Or eat ice cream. Maybe both. Same time.

The amount of being on I had to deal with this past weekend is still wearing on me. And while I usually look forward to Wednesdays to see people in the office, honestly, I could do with another day by myself.

Listened to audiobook of Dexter Palmer's VERSION CONTROL read by the brilliant January LaVoy. I'd read this book years ago and loved it. One of the best novels about time travel (that is not really about time travel). Funny, touching, deeply philosophical without being didactic. Highly recommended.

The Lawrence of Arabia score is the best film score of all time. And most streaming services cut both the overture and intermission which is sacrilege.

One problem of Blue Sky is realizing (more so) that lefties can be just as dim witted and mean spirited as their righty counterparts. The anti-semitism still exists, but of a different flavor. Less Chubby Hubby, more Cherry Garcia.

Distortions of truth are not confined to one side of the political divide. Those who fuzzy the truth do so because they prefer an idealized world as opposed to the messy, uncomfortable and vastly unknowable one we are confronted with.

When everyone you meet is an asshole, you’re the asshole. Unless, frankly, you’re not, and you just happened to walk into Assholes Eponymous.

Having drinks, discussing the sad state of American politics. Woman next to us turns and says: “I think we have to come to the realization that our country’s controlled by Israel.” Sigh.

I hear “oh I can’t write” from so many people who literally put words on paper or screens every day. It’s not playing piano or tap dancing. It’s a skill that most people possess but never see past its necessary functionality.

There is a legitimate argument to be made for electing Cuomo mayor. But it smacks of realpolitik, expediency, cynicism, ruthlessness, and the belief that none of the other candidates can stand up to Lady Marmalade. So, pass.

Happy that the Bears get one last chance to end Aaron Rodgers career.

Just posting my sorta kinda told you so.

I will not believe in the Trump-Elon feud until: 1. Trump cancels Elon’s government contracts; and 2. Elon releases the pee pee tape, which totally exists and which Elon must have.

Can you have a work wife if you don’t have a real wife?

Hard won failure is superior to easy success.

Once a month or so I dedicate my 35 minute commute to listening to Pink Floyd and feeling sorry for myself. It’s like an enema for the soul. Then back to general mischief and mayhem.

Surprised more people don’t use an HSA as an extra retirement account, says the guy who 20 years ago said by the time he’d be able to retire he’d be either rich or dead. (Both possibilities still on the table.)

Wake early. Coffee, croissant. Write four hours. Nap it off. Baseball game (win). Dinner with friend. Scotch (Talisker). A perfect day.

Saturday night French restaurant in Manhattan. I’m so young!

I’ve never ever walked out of a movie. Only twice did I come close, and both films are generally well liked: Shrek and Avatar. The worst film I’ve seen in the theaters (or anywhere) was Lady in the Water which was so bad I forgot I had the ability to move my legs.

On this Memorial Day, the question is which servicemember’s grave willTrump remove to better line up his putt.

Friendship is the Chuck and Buck of One Hour Photos.

When I told my barber I was gonna keep my hair longer and their like, finally.

I don’t care if you wish to pray for me, as long as you know the gesture will not be returned.

I forgot how draining writing can be. Mentally, emotionally, even physically. It’s like the best high followed by a nasty crash. And yet, I still got an eight ball to go through before the weekend is out.

Long weekend. No plans but watch baseball, cook, do some cleaning, catch a movie or two, and wake up early to write. Three days without people. Heaven.

I will block anyone who uses the word sheeple. Unless it’s in reference to an actual human/sheep hybrid.

Why am I getting so many Premier League posts? I’d prefer hurling if anything. Thanks algorithm.

Yes the Rockies had the worst first 50 games ever. But Trump had the worst first 100 days. So, something to aspire to, my Coors drinking mountain men!

Half my conversations end with me really wanting to tell the other person, “It’s not always about you.” And yes, many of those talks are directed at a mirror. But seriously, people, don’t make everything that happens somehow about you.

So to be eligible to get a COVID booster I’m going to have to gain back all the weight I just lost. To the Chubby Hubby!!

It’s notable that Netanyahu isn’t evil enough for Trump.

I really cannot wait for the IPA love to finally die down. I used to adore IPAs but then I grew up and realized that just because it makes your lips pucker doesn’t make it good beer.

About to watch Tom Cruise save the world. Again.

Back in the New York groove.

How to make a proper Old Fashioned: Muddle: cherry, orange slice, simple syrup, bitters Pour: whiskey Add: ice Splash: soda (not necessary) No shaking, no stirring. Think of it as a layered drink, with each sip getting a bit sweeter.

Just because others don’t do the right thing doesn’t mean you shouldn’t.

Dear James Comey: Stop trying to help. Love and knishes, Her emails, etc.