Profile avatar
mainemansam.bsky.social
Frequently sardonic Libra
310 posts 1,916 followers 3,508 following
Regular Contributor
Active Commenter
Posts 22 Comments 28

Somehow I joined a Facebook group titled “Grandma’s Old Recipes.” I fucking quit.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Me: “I don’t need this lightning cord.” Apple TV remote: “Good luck, asshole.”

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

I bought an $89 fan. Motherfucker. I can’t be trusted with credit.

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

They should make it a capital offense to put ground coffee and unground coffee next to each other on the shelf at the grocery store. —ramblings of a angry guy with no grinder and a $9 bag of beans.

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

The most glorious of all days. Remembering you have a baguette in-house

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

Making kebobs. So far chicken, peppers, onion, zucchini, and about 8 puncture wounds.

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

Contemplating my snacks for the week. Top of the list? Celery Second? Hemlock.

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

$1.99 frozen grocery store jalapeño poppers? Yes. A thousand times yes.

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

“Alexa, play ABBA.” I need to stop day-drinking

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

Last night, both the former governor of Maine and a dirty Hav-a-Heart trap were in my local bar. The Hav-a-Heart was the least noxious

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

Double-dose of cucumbers and I’m one step from being the Hindenburg

submitted 39 days ago • 0 comments

When hauling a ladder, and you don’t have anything to hang, a Santa hat will do

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

I don’t want to brag but I planned my week of pants perfectly

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

Ritz. So overrated.

submitted 45 days ago • 3 comments

As full micro moons go, this one is pretty good

submitted 46 days ago • 0 comments

Something kept taking my dog’s bones off the deck. I was guessing raccoon, fox, or skunk. I was wrong.

submitted 51 days ago • 2 comments

Tried this line in high school, never worked,

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

Just Alexa, twice, the names of the four Teletubbies #anotherSaturdayNight

submitted 62 days ago • 0 comments

Where am I? Grocery store hummus.

submitted 74 days ago • 0 comments

Haven’t burst not flames yet

submitted 76 days ago • 0 comments

I wasn’t prepared for this recipe to be so cutting board heavy. I’m down to using an old pizza box.

submitted 82 days ago • 0 comments