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ooheyeooh.bsky.social
i read tarot, tarot reads me. i play music sometimes. way too into Excel
622 posts 211 followers 295 following
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Posts 14 Comments 36

Yeah my job is pretty cool. My uniform is a tactical vest that’s two sizes too small and a gaiter I bought in a gas station. They send me to sneak into schools to kidnap little kids because people got mad about having to press 1 for English. The president had to warn everyone to stop spitting on me.

submitted 1 day ago • 47 comments

It’s really funny to say that cameras aren’t allowed in courtrooms but that someone can paint a little picture of what happened

submitted 1 day ago • 16 comments

@kschake.bsky.social look I know you're getting dragged in the comments, so I just wanted to point that out

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Yeah I guess LeBron putting up a 22.6 PER is pretty special, but it's not that impressive when you compare him to people rolling out of bed and firing off something like this at age 86.

submitted 3 days ago • 114 comments

I have ascended

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

When in Rome wasn't built in a day, all the roads led to it.

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

look for the helpers

submitted 13 days ago • 2 comments

Yes my imaginary friend is real! I know this because I am constantly creating him

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Alt+0151 and option-shift-hyphen are easy enough. The real giveaway that text is from ChatGPT is that it strikes that perfect balance between soullessness and sucking shit

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

"I spoke with a few congressional staffers who said that they had tried using Bluesky as an alternative to Twitter after Twitter was purchased by Elon Musk, but they gave up after their bosses kept getting yelled at by Democratic users angry at their impotence" www.semafor.com/newsletter/0...

submitted 16 days ago • 334 comments

When in Rome wasn't built in a day, all the roads led to it.

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

I don't think people hate strip malls so much as they do the giant, hot, ugly parking lots in front of them

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

Any dinner can be a murder mystery dinner if you're ambitious enough.

submitted 32 days ago • 11 comments

careful not to overheat it

submitted 21 days ago • 0 comments