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rebrafsim.bsky.social
“jokes” header by Dave (Cactus) my best stuff: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ofbhd4x65yjzuoh27ceq3n76/feed/aaab23k2b5q3a
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Posts 28 Comments 21

We're at the top of the food chain, but let's not be too full of ourselves. After all, some of us can be felled by a single peanut.

submitted 8 hours ago • 2 comments

Check out my gourmet sausage e-commerce website. I’ll send you a link.

submitted 3 days ago • 8 comments

[pharmaceutical hq] CEO: we need some new drug names MKTG GUY: cymbalta fabhalta veozah VP: ar-are you ok MKTG GUY: kisqali austedo phexxi VP: sir he’s having a stroke MKTG GUY: xgeva toujeo zeposia VP: we should call 911 MKTG GUY: xeljanz opdivo wegovy CEO: *writing* now let’s not be hasty

submitted 2 days ago • 12 comments

I also think the bbb is an abomination and people should be impeached can I get paid to run things

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

look ❌👑 might not be my choice for a slogan (or whatever it is) but like twenty million people need to be out there on june 14 so find your local indivisible group and show up please @indivisible.org

submitted 3 days ago • 2 comments

there are two ways to take a shower, and the people at home depot yell at you either way

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

gosh dang it to heck! it’s the

submitted 4 days ago • 112 comments

*slowly slides PBJ under seat*

submitted 4 days ago • 282 comments

“WHO YOU CALLING A BUNCH OF PANSIES?!?”

submitted 5 days ago • 444 comments

Three more pension cheques and I'll have my student loan paid off.

submitted 5 days ago • 3 comments

I also know nothing about hurricanes can I get paid to run things

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

me: like eleanor roosevelt said, I try to to one thing every day that doesn’t scare me wife: no she said do one thing every day that DOES me: are you sure

submitted 6 days ago • 5 comments

“Dammit, Glen, you can do this. You’re good looking, smart and funny. She’ll love you. Just be you. And remember not to look at the candle.”

submitted 6 days ago • 3 comments

"Morning, Jim!" "Hey, Tom."

submitted 6 days ago • 286 comments

dear activist groups that somehow got my email: if you want me to esign your petition, please show me your petition. who is esigning shit they haven’t read? don’t do that

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

brian was starting to think that maybe his mom wasn’t coming back

submitted 9 days ago • 496 comments

“Everyone say cheese!” “Cheese!” “Cheese!” “Cheese!” “Cheese!” “Fuck you, Theresa.”

submitted 8 days ago • 35 comments

I also think we’re all gonna die can I get paid to run things

submitted 8 days ago • 4 comments

you gotta be faster

submitted 8 days ago • 127 comments

when you and your sibling have to pretend to like each other long enough for mom to take the picture

submitted 8 days ago • 33 comments

rock: oh fuck I’m covered with paper tell my wife I love her

submitted 341 days ago • 8 comments

*unleashes the kraken *the kraken runs off to play with the other krakens in the park

submitted 11 days ago • 4 comments

You don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone. Except chlamydia, I knew I had that right away.

submitted 12 days ago • 6 comments

me: *on psychiatrist’s couch* psychiatrist: get out of my living room

submitted 11 days ago • 1 comment

“Can we go outside and play now?” “Soon, boy.” “You said that ten minutes ago.” “As soon as I finish my cof-“ “Oops.” “You did that on purpose.” “It slipped.” “I’ll get my coat.” “Excellent.”

submitted 11 days ago • 487 comments

“You drive, I’m tired.”

submitted 12 days ago • 56 comments

mulder: the truth is out there america: oh fuck where is it on me kill it now did you kill it

submitted 11 days ago • 1 comment

25 of the funniest posts we’ve seen on Bluesky this week. www.thepoke.com/2025/05/28/2...

submitted 11 days ago • 2 comments