rezeski.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

“let me make this crystal murky,”

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Bugs Bunny taught me my choices aren’t limited to fight or flight; I can also pretend I’m a pretty lady.

submitted 2 days ago • 9 comments

dinner date Me: What are the specials again? Him: (an ophthalmologist) Steak? Or trout? 1 or 2? Me: Hm..trout. Him: Good. Which is better? Mixed veggies? Or mashed potatoes?

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

According to this typo, I put a misspell on you.

submitted 1 day ago • 5 comments

Him: Ouch, why is your leg hair so long? Me: It's for collecting pollen

submitted 3 days ago • 10 comments

age is just a number that determines how horrible you feel about yourself

submitted 1 day ago • 5 comments

My fortune cookie just said 'die bitch' and I don't know what to do with that.

submitted 2 days ago • 9 comments

“Do one thing every day that scares you” (reads the national news)

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

I've been to hell & back . . . because when I got there I realized I forgot my phone.

submitted 3 days ago • 5 comments

Elon Musk has publicly criticized Donald Trump’s new spending bill, expressing disappointment that it would add $3.8 trillion to the federal deficit. MAGA got conned...again...and when they see most of the benefits going to the 1% they will just ignore it...again...

submitted 4 days ago • 4 comments

submitted 4 days ago • 72 comments

Report: Texting While Driving Okay If You Look Up Every Couple Seconds theonion.com/report-...

submitted 4 days ago • 59 comments

Phang: We don’t need the Ten Commandments hanging in Texas schools. What we need is common-sense gun legislation—so the kids can live. If my kid goes to a public school in Texas and they can’t come home alive, I don’t give a shit about the Ten Commandments being posted on the wall.

submitted 5 days ago • 890 comments

submitted 8 days ago • 1514 comments

Announce your arrival ahead of time by wearing bell bottom pants.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Stephen Miller got into politics because his arms were too weak to strangle prostitutes.

submitted 8 days ago • 319 comments

Just listened to the Hur interview tape and I’m utterly appalled at all the incoherent and crazy things Biden said about Revolutionary War airports, injecting bleach, people eating cats and dogs, Hannibal Lecter, and Arnold Palmer’s penis. Simply unbelievable that he ran for president again.

submitted 14 days ago • 293 comments

#8647 doesn’t mean what Trump said James Comey meant —to assassinate. It means #IMPEACH ! Impeach #DonaldTrump.

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

“Can’t 86 him? 25th him.” — Founding Fathers, probably.

submitted 15 days ago • 423 comments

Swung by Harbor Freight so Kevin could look for a transfer pump. ME: I’m gonna stay in the car. If you wanna go in, feel free. STEPSON: Nah, I don’t think there’s anything in there I’ll need ‘til I’m forty.

submitted 15 days ago • 28 comments

I have enough money to retire if I die this afternoon

submitted 15 days ago • 7 comments

submitted 15 days ago • 11 comments

submitted 15 days ago • 262 comments

🛑🛑🛑🚦

submitted 15 days ago • 67 comments

Yes, we noticed. You're still here.

submitted 15 days ago • 1591 comments

it’s always disappointing when i think i’ve found a good picture to caption but it doesn’t bear fruit

submitted 14 days ago • 19 comments

submitted 15 days ago • 10 comments

Trump's New Post About Taylor Swift Is So Immature, We Needed Child Psychologists To Explain His Thinking ( #Trump is basically just a very old child. )

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

Always leave them wanting amnesia.

submitted 15 days ago • 4 comments

submitted 15 days ago • 771 comments

submitted 16 days ago • 48 comments

That’s why you’re still here.

submitted 15 days ago • 1377 comments

FOR ALL!

submitted 16 days ago • 22 comments