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sj.gg
journalist refuses to wear edible disguises endorsements ≠ endorsements he/him/that one check out my website
2,594 posts 10,362 followers 920 following
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Posts 25 Comments 24

damn that rug must be FILTHY

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

whoops! almost slept thru bedtime

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

shirt with "FENTANYL" on it in the scary font. you can buy it. bc why not www.etsy.com/listing/4320...

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

some replies on here make me want to respond “calm down, kys”

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

there's a super cool giant moth in the bathroom. so that's how my day is going (great!)

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

im pretty sure i can get my keys back out of the lava

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

i.. ♻️ 24k ❤️ 130k

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

it's homophobic for the weather not to be nice in june

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

lol that's my same shoe size www.livescience.com/archaeology/...

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

every time I see a shirt I already own i'm like "ooh that's a cool shirt!" and i buy it again

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

what if we find aliens and they really are like star trek: people with extra shit on their face

submitted 3 days ago • 2 comments

in the new DOOM the boss demons cry when you kill them, which i think is a nice improvement

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Worth considering that one reason Bluesky doesn't always feel super fun is that current events are relentlessly horrifying and bad

submitted 5 days ago • 350 comments

they should try the PT Cruiser again. we’re insane enough

submitted 5 days ago • 20 comments

Descartes: I think therefore I am Me, who hasn’t had a thought since 2003: you do what

submitted 6 days ago • 17 comments

dude this party is such an echo chamber. it's just friends hanging out and chilling and having a good time. you need to invite some people over who want to kill you with hammers

submitted 6 days ago • 391 comments

Breaking: RFK Jr. has died after contracting one of every disease

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

fun ways to answer a ringing phone: 1. “Daddy?” 2. “It’s almost time” 3. “How did you get this number?” 4. “Taliban!” 5. “Explain yourself!” 6. “So, what do *you* know?” 7. “Where is my daughter??!” 8. “What are you wearing?” 9. “Time’s up, buster” 10. “Sorry! I’m ovulating!”

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

walked into a restaurant and there was neither a "SEAT YOURSELF" nor a "WAIT TO BE SEATED" sign. so that's how my year is going

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

ST PETE: you've been a good father… hard worker… faithful husband… all good stuff. Regular Heaven material, no question ME: Thank you sir ST PETE: wait… this "Posts Read" number... is this accurate? ME: Yes sir. I take great pride in my post reading ST PETE: that's it. Super Heaven for you my friend

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Sound off in the comments: shoes on? or shoes off in the shower?

submitted 6 days ago • 4 comments

guy who thinks cranking ur hog just means operating your emergency ham radio

submitted 8 days ago • 3 comments

a post from my cat: MMMRRRROOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWoooowwwww

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

not sure if everyone knows but the coffee pot does not turn on if it is not plugged in

submitted 9 days ago • 46 comments

cis4cis relationships confuse me. like which one of you is the doll-coded girlthing desperate for purpose and approval who goes awawa and which of you is the seductive witch who traces the doll's joints and talks in great detail about how she is going to disassemble it while covertly hypnotizing it?

submitted 9 days ago • 5 comments