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unlimitedbasil.bsky.social
I eat oatmeal late at night and dislike multiples of five. she/her
170 posts 201 followers 332 following
Prolific Poster
Posts 41 Comments 8

please don't put the bugles on your fingers and pretend they are claws it scares me

submitted 3 days ago • 9 comments

once again I must tap my own sign

submitted 6 days ago • 236 comments

the more i’m online the more i realize i’m not actually online im just like kinda here doin jokey jokes and there are things happening all over the place that i don’t understand

submitted 6 days ago • 7 comments

I should be able to just charge my phone once and be done with it

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

If my neighbors catch a glimpse of me naked that’s their problem not mine

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

You're in her DMs. I'm a gigantic radioactive reptile who razed her hometown and accidentally killed her entire family while fighting Mothra. She hates us both; we're sort of the same.

submitted 15 days ago • 3 comments

Lassoing some fellas and bros for my dude ranch

submitted 14 days ago • 15 comments

I’m a fun and chill person to be friends with

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

If you’re a man and you’re from Long Island, you’re a bad person. I don’t make the rules.

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

There are a lot of things I can do but using cling wrap is not one of them

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

So single I don’t even check to see who’s viewed my Instagram stories

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

I cannot reasonably be expected to vacuum

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

They should invent a body that’s not miserable to exist in

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

You’re in her DMs. I have never even heard of her, because the world is vast and you can only meet so many people.

submitted 44 days ago • 2 comments

I’m a fun and chill person to be friends with

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

For every action there is an equal and opposite nap.

submitted 50 days ago • 6 comments

going to go be absorbed by the earth, anybody need anything?

submitted 53 days ago • 10 comments

It sucks how it’s physiologically impossible to drink a glass and a half of wine without wanting to make out with everyone around you

submitted 53 days ago • 0 comments

"I'm almost 30 and I'm scared I've already peaked" don't peak then. what do u mean ur going to stop trying to think harder& learn more& read deeper& dress better& fuck weirder& run faster& dance bigger& stun with ur charm and zeal. get real. u have another 50 years and yr not going to use them???

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

Taking PTO because I accidentally stuck a Q-tip too far into my ear

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

If your psychiatrist is 15 minutes late that means you legally get to stop having an anxiety disorder

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

imagine if spiders could breakdance

submitted 56 days ago • 29 comments

🌎🌍🌏WRISTY'S BUSINESS🌎🌍🌏 WHAT'S THAT? you skeet, we reskeet! HOW DOES THAT WORK?? it's easy! All you need is a link to a funny skeet. Guests: @damnitjanet.bsky.social @unfitz.bsky.social @professorkiosk.wtf @sonictyrant.bsky.social and some secret reskeeters too! more details below:

submitted 56 days ago • 28 comments

Hitting rock bottom still beats hitting scissors bottom

submitted 56 days ago • 2 comments

OUTSIDE of you, there are MILLIONS of wolves

submitted 112 days ago • 5 comments

I’m a fun and chill person to be friends with

submitted 56 days ago • 0 comments

AAHHHH

submitted 56 days ago • 0 comments

It occurs to me that we are the million monkeys on the million typewriters

submitted 57 days ago • 9 comments

Could a person without executive function do THIS??? - me, submitting my tax return an hour before midnight on April 15

submitted 56 days ago • 0 comments

Can’t tell whether my vitamin D deficiency has been cured or I just had a nice weekend

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

The most important part of a road trip is buying the most disgusting gas station snack imaginable

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

I love when someone asks me what I am doing this weekend because the answer is I am going to a monster truck rally

submitted 64 days ago • 0 comments

Heathen is a beautiful name for a baby girl

submitted 62 days ago • 1 comment

Life would be so easy if I only had a different brain and a different body and a different soul

submitted 62 days ago • 1 comment

I don’t understand how anyone can get work done on just their laptop. I need 7 monitors and a special ergonomic mouse just to check my email.

submitted 62 days ago • 0 comments

our bodies spent millions of years developing alarm systems to warn us of impending doom, and I'm just supposed to ignore all of them all day and focus on work

submitted 63 days ago • 6 comments

I have this disorder where whenever I hear people singing in harmony I’m absolutely overcome with the beauty of it all even if it’s literally just Kesha and T Pain singing “bitch, I just got a brand new car”

submitted 64 days ago • 0 comments

I’m a fun and chill person to be friends with

submitted 64 days ago • 0 comments

When I don’t text my friends back it’s because I’m busy or forgot, but when my friends don’t text me back it’s because they wish I would fall into a volcano

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

Bean bag chairs are just deboned couches

submitted 67 days ago • 10 comments

Accidentally blew too hard when extinguishing a candle and wax flew into my mouth. Can’t wait to see what else this week has in store for me!

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments