It's not only a thing, it's very common and well-known. Dude needs to leave his street sometime! Bro there's a whole world outside your parents' basement!
Also like… confident fuckboy straight men don’t require misogyny? It just requires someone who’s not been previously interested in long term relationships and has been promiscuous.
I feel like this assumption of misogyny being an important part is why a lot of modern romance sucks.
I recently started reading the Vorkosigan Saga and the fact that Aral does not at any point mistreat Cordelia made it way more tolerable to read than most modern romances.
Also like I knew someone like this as early as when I was in highschool (the cool, confident, and casual wlw, not the moron redditor who thinks all women must be innocent angels). She was bi, which I'm sure makes her even more problematic to these kinds of people lmao.
Since I mentioned the L-Word above I’ll mention this is one of the actual plot lines: cool, confident, and casual bi woman who was so angry dating a man because of the way people treated her.
"I'm sorry for reaching out in this way🌹🌹🌹
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I'm a retired dog-brained party boy himbo and some of the lesbians I knew back then were even bigger sluts than I was so idk where they're getting this from.
We have a stereotype look for it too, in the US at least. Backwards cap, hand on the chin, the "Haha, you're so sexy babe..." type. They get called Golden Retrievers in human form.
This is full on "uwu women are actually pure beings incapable of any scandalous thoughts" and flattening women behaviours with a forging press (lesbians please calm down I also want to be put through the forging press)
This is so fucking insane. God forbid a power dynamic occur between two people on an even gender playing field, instead of between the patriarchal assigned rape gender and victim gender.
One of the most obnoxious things straight people do (often w/o realizing they’re doing it!) is treating lesbian relationships as automatically predatory the author/whatever proves them “safe” (usually: boring to read)
I mean 50 shades with lesbians would mean it's a god awful fan fiction of a slightly less awful lesbian vampire novel.
Probably might have been better and at least it wouldn't have caused a tsunami of shitty "dominant" cis het dudes into the kink world when the movie hit.
Not sure I want a badly written fan fic about a woman failing to work through her own trauma by engaging in the worst thought out kink this side of the mcstories archive.
The thing is, I CAN Imagine 50 shades of grey but it's lesbians. That sort of nothing kink play and shitty relationship dynamics do feel like the kind of ""sapphic"" books I get suggested by anyone who isn't a horny trans person.
somebody teally needs to process their own internalized misogyny and/or talk to literally a single lesbian
not only does the confident fuckgirl lesbian exist, but ime, slut shaming is not a huge concern for her
and that's assuming a story has earth-equivalent patriarchy, which, it doesn't have to!
I don't think so, and it doesn't escape my notice that the word ‘lesbian’ isn't used even once in this comment. Lots of people treating it like it's dirty or something.
That thread was fun to read through. I didn't expect it to blow up in the way that it did, some folks reasoning for "what tropes don't work for ff (and consequently frequently mm)" is like... "I think you mean you want it to be well written....?"
So many brains would be saved with basic literature classes or writing workshops, we all want to read great literature in every genre especially erotica
Like, just because it's enemies to lovers doesn't mean it's going to be reylo (if one is a fan of that or they are not lol) the assumption and judgement of quality based on the book being that/not being that is unfortunate.
also completely missing that "whore" rhetoric is mostly a patriarchy thing (so if you don't fuck men, it makes no difference at all)
the instinctive transfer of straight rhetoric over to lesbians is fascinating. i suspect these sapphic don't date many lesbians irl (very tragic, get well soon queen)
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I can’t type anything else just wow
I feel like this assumption of misogyny being an important part is why a lot of modern romance sucks.
Like there's a reason lgbt people are more poly. Because we don't tie ourselves down by societal notions.
Like sometimes it’s cool to discuss but at the same time they should just… read the books
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like queer people literally invented the language of power dynamics??
Probably might have been better and at least it wouldn't have caused a tsunami of shitty "dominant" cis het dudes into the kink world when the movie hit.
So def better for that
I mean I've already got that, but a new secret kind that I hate even more than the normal sort
Maybe try figuring out why before making it everyone else's problem, yeah?
I try to be respectful and considerate, but even still I'm pretty sure I fall into the "confident lesbian fuckgirl" category by these folks standards
it's also possible to be promiscuous without the misogyny, imo
not only does the confident fuckgirl lesbian exist, but ime, slut shaming is not a huge concern for her
and that's assuming a story has earth-equivalent patriarchy, which, it doesn't have to!
Concluding these tropes don't work is... Sad haha
Like, just because it's enemies to lovers doesn't mean it's going to be reylo (if one is a fan of that or they are not lol) the assumption and judgement of quality based on the book being that/not being that is unfortunate.
"if a girl did that, she'd be called a WHORE!" yes.... and then she'd keep living! shave your head! grow your bush! nobody can stop you!
every so often i'm reminded just how many sapphic women r still bound to the shackles of patriarchy, & i start getting really depressed lol
the instinctive transfer of straight rhetoric over to lesbians is fascinating. i suspect these sapphic don't date many lesbians irl (very tragic, get well soon queen)