no, "Compulsory Homosexuality" isnt a thing for trans women 🧵 to begin with, let's look at why one might think it is. yes, a lot of bi trans women didn't date men until transitioning because transition let them become more comfortable in their own selves & sexuality. this happened to me, for one. - ThreadSky

femiurge.bsky.social • 27 days ago

no, "Compulsory Homosexuality" isnt a thing for trans women 🧵

to begin with, let's look at why one might think it is. yes, a lot of bi trans women didn't date men until transitioning because transition let them become more comfortable in their own selves & sexuality. this happened to me, for one.

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katie.bzky.team•27 days ago

banger thread oomfie

idaclemens.bsky.social•27 days ago

I had this experience but I never considered it "comphomo". Like, a pre-transition trans man faces comphet on the basis of his agab, right? I'd argue trans women face something similar in the opposite direction. The pressure to be hetero affects us as to both our agab and our internal gender.

idaclemens.bsky.social•27 days ago

Trans women plainly face pressure both (1) to "be a man," which carries with it pressure to be a straight man who dates women, and (2) if we reject that, then we face pressure to submit to men in order to demonstrate "true womanhood. These pressures go in opposite directions b/c it's a double bind.

qexat.com•27 days ago

ohhh I kept reading the quotes as "Compulsory Heterosexuality" and I was confused as it would contradict with the thread lol I guess I'm just tired and should get some sleep 🥲

phoebii.bsky.social•27 days ago

I like dick ^_^
But I haven't met a man to make me attracted sexually, let alone romantically. It's just a fantasy now.
It's a bit sad I guess.

I'm with a woman at the moment, I'm a bisexual.

volition-newlove.itch.io•27 days ago

many androphilic trans women seem to act like not considering the pressures they face to not date men "comphomo" as an erasure of their identity and i feel like they're stumbling into another trap trans people regardless of their sexuality fall into

volition-newlove.itch.io•27 days ago

arguing trans people's ontology in terms of sex around which people are attracted to them per their sexual orientation (usually, in terms of whether heterosexual cis men are attracted to trans women) is something people do a lot, and it's kind of a dead end

volition-newlove.itch.io•27 days ago

even if it were demonstrated that all cishet men were attracted to trans women and no cisgay men were, you're still left defining womanhood around sexual desirability to men (and extending it to also define it around cis women's sexual attraction doesn't fix the problem)

gingermophobia.bsky.social•26 days ago

this is the first i've heard of this discourse but my gut reaction is gtfo lol. for most of the last century, trans women typically weren't even allowed to transition if they weren't attracted to men, and to this day, trans lesbianism remains stigmatized as evidence that you're still a man deep down

theyfab.bsky.social•27 days ago

*seeing some lesbians be kind of annoying online* this is literally worse than patriarchy

inplacesdeep.bsky.social•27 days ago

I'm mad at how accurate this is

femiurge.bsky.social•27 days ago

many such cases

theyfab.bsky.social•27 days ago

it's almost like it comes from some sort of widespread hatred or fear of lesbians.... if only there was some sort of word for that..........

trans.bsky.social•27 days ago

cishet academic: (*festering with brainworms*) i think that word is ‘misandry’.

owlgoddess.bsky.social•27 days ago

i love all these smoke on the horizon type posts i keep seeing without any of the context for what prompted them its like coming back from the bathroom and the teacher is scolding the class and you're trying to figure out what happened

alexissara.bsky.social•27 days ago

I am not joking when I say every "adult" member of my family asked if I was gay and that's why. They were convinced that beinf a woman = wanting to fuck dudes and so were the majority of trans women I spoke to growing up.

trans.bsky.social•27 days ago

> “compulsory homosexuality”

holy rancid transmisogyny, batwoman.

steph1873.bsky.social•27 days ago

Go back several decades. You may find that there was a time where you weren’t considered to be trans woman unless you were a sex worker.

trans.bsky.social•27 days ago

could you clarify what you meant by this please?

steph1873.bsky.social•27 days ago

This is what I remember: There was a school of thought that one had to do sex work as part of the “real life test“. It was a hurtful idea and it damaged a lot of people. Herpes and AIDS probably killed it off for good.

trans.bsky.social•27 days ago

jesus christ

trans.bsky.social•27 days ago

your sentence was kind of unclear, but i *think* you’re commenting on a historical way comphet /patriarchy enforced trans women often being viewed as essentially “public” property for male consumption.

if that’s the case, i agree with you that is horrible.

awesomejess.bsky.social•27 days ago

When I left Brazil that was still the way they were viewed, 10 years ago

endtimesenjoyer.bsky.social•27 days ago

yuuup

phloebotomy.bsky.social•27 days ago

oh, i misread homo- as hetero- and got v confused. but ig this makes sense? def have more brainworms to get over regarding attraction to women than attraction to men.

raveltglossmoth.bsky.social•27 days ago

Do we need to start calling it 'Compulsory CisHeterosexuality'?

Because the 'cis' part is a big part of it, and where the 'why can't you just be a gay man?' side stems from. Society prefers a cis gay man to a trans het woman.

Would that help with clarity around topics like this?

trexpushups.bsky.social•26 days ago

I had been with a few guys before but until estrogen I didn't know how good they can smell

femiurge.bsky.social•27 days ago

such women might experience their attraction to men as more forbidden or even liberatory than their attraction to women as a residual effect of the heterosexual indoctrination they experienced while in the closet. and I'm not even gonna say they're wrong for feeling so!

femiurge.bsky.social•27 days ago

however, at least as common as these situations are instances of trans women feeling obligated or pressured to try men after transition. my parents are about as accepting as a girl could hope for, but one of the first things they asked me when I came out was "are you gonna date guys now?"

feminincubus.bsky.social•27 days ago

I had pretty much that experience, as well. It makes me wonder if even accepting parents aren't still holding onto some kind of hope that we'll at least be "normal" after we start transition.

femiurge.bsky.social•27 days ago

for less progressive people, this manifests as the classic "why can't you just be a gay man" question even if the trans girl has only ever shown interest in women.

Furthermore, comphet doesn't just exist for trans women, but it has much higher stakes. the cultural impact of Blanchardianism has--

femiurge.bsky.social•27 days ago

made it so doctors wouldn't even prescribe hrt to trans women who didn't seem "hsts" (exclusively into men). our culture conflates womanhood with heterosexual attraction to men, and when it comes to trans women this conflation is all too explicit.

bigbadwolfgirl.me•27 days ago

holy shit - this helps a lot with things I'm wrestling with. Thank you for your perspectives here. <3

ts-eliot.bsky.social•27 days ago

And the conflation is by design. Cf. basically the entire thrust of Monique Wittig's The Straight Mind.

andralyn.bsky.social•27 days ago

A million years ago when I came out as a trans lesbian to my cis GF (a lesbian who had pursued ME, go figure) she told me "don't ever say that to anyone else."

Strange times.

fleshkaiju.bsky.social•26 days ago

I honestly tried to delude myself into thinking I was attracted to men after coming out because I was afraid of being perceived as the "predatory man trying to sneak into a lesbian's bedroom"

antimattering.bsky.social•27 days ago

In a world where people aren't criminally stupid and transmisogynistic, this would be all anyone has to say. There have been and are actual mechanisms to force attraction (sexual availability) to men. No such equivalent exists for attraction to women.

deviloftherhin.bsky.social•27 days ago

I was gonna get angry at you cuz I thought this was about comphet. I mean, it was, but like not. Anyway, keep cooking queen

rfpoland.bsky.social•26 days ago

Really I think the key is for everyone to collectively stop giving a shit who gets their jollies from who. These labels just divide us. I am trans and pan, but also kind of ace. Really it is what it is, and everyone is different, and the fact that we shame each other into catch-22s is just dumb.

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