I am seeing a lot on social media about a certain celebrity and “banter” and how some see it as harmless and women do not. There is criticism of women who speak out years after the event. A few comments as I have some experience of “banter” in medicine 1/? #MedSky - ThreadSky

maffygirl.medsky.social • 92 days ago

I am seeing a lot on social media about a certain celebrity and “banter” and how some see it as harmless and women do not. There is criticism of women who speak out years after the event.
A few comments as I have some experience of “banter” in medicine
1/?
#MedSky

Comments

maffygirl.medsky.social•92 days ago

Banter is when we all have a light hearted joke about each other, we all are involved and laugh. We need to make sure all are engaged and so it’s better one on one fun banter as you can control the narrative.
#MedSky

maffygirl.medsky.social•92 days ago

The “banter” decribed as offensive occurs when you do not know the other person or they are in a position of power over you. The words they use are unexpected and you are not an equal participant. You are caught off guard and shocked.
You are confused as to why this has happened

maffygirl.medsky.social•92 days ago

You are embarrassed and they recognise this and it thrills them.
Do you respond and what will be the immediate results are your first thoughts. What did I do to deserve this, maybe it’s me or maybe they are just weird.
Should I tell someone??

maffygirl.medsky.social•92 days ago

On some occasions I kept quiet and on others I spoke out.
Speaking out only caused me personal and professional difficulty.
I applaud women speaking out on this occasion if only to recognise it was not you as the only person involved.
Banter is abuse if you do not consent.

maffygirl.medsky.social•92 days ago

Banter is abuse if you do not consent
#MedSky

fionapaterson.bsky.social•92 days ago

This. In the past when I’ve spoken out the insults got much, much worse so you end up doing your best to ignore it. Being shy, younger & less confident than the person concerned makes it all the harder.

godlessdoc.bsky.social•92 days ago

It’s more difficult to speak up when you have everything to lose. Once you’re well established and secure in your position, I feel like you have an obligation to shut that shite down.

drsusannahp.bsky.social•92 days ago

Well said.
‘Banter’ when there is inequality in status or power isn’t really banter. It is not pleasant to be on the receiving end of this and the power differential makes reporting it very difficult.

tedgreiner.bsky.social•91 days ago

I have difficulty discriminating between bantering statements, threats, and just generally negative comments that people later claim were jokes. So as a young man I decided to take them all as if the potential negative undertone was the real message. Now 76, I've found it to be a useful strategy.

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