Whenever someone makes a racist or sexist joke I find it very effective to respond, “I’m afraid I don’t understand the joke. Would you care to explain?” and then watch as they flail helplessly, twisting themselves into an ouroboros of evasion and denial.
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I ask, "Do you know what DEI is?"
And then I force them to spell out that they are AGAINST diversity, AGAINST equity, and AGAINST inclusion. Once they say it out loud, it rings with racism & bigotry.
Like with my cousin's boss, who told a sexist/homophobic joke.
"Oh sorry sir, they're Canadian, they didn't get it."
"Oh! Well, it's like thi--"
"No, I got it. It just wasn't funny."
(In Brazil, 1993.)
"Hm. Guess not."
Damn straight.
Your boss, not mine, cuz. I don't hafta laugh at his shitty jokes.
I'd have walked away at this point, but we were standing in his front yard, at night, in Not My City.
It was painful, but it had to be done. He never told racist jokes again in my presence.