Date sweet men. men who are calm. men who can articulate themselves. men who are soft spoken. men who are patient with you. men who respect both you and themselves . men who are kind to you. men that are gentle. men who have self control.🤞🏾💓
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I think that's the only way. I tell people to describe the things they like and then ask them to find where people that like those things would congregate. Friends first!! Men who would never consider a woman a friend are Republicans whether they say they are or not
Unfortunately, most of us have stepped on too much and have grown to enjoy self isolation. But I'm with you. Most men and women alike continue to choose abuse and toxic behaviors because they think little of themselves. Understand your true worth and THEN you'll be happy.
This was my husband...everyday and more! I was a lucky woman for having him. (RIP) I wish he was here NOW, but at the same time I'm glad he doesn't have to ensure what is happening to our country. He had a way of keeping me calm during any storm.
I've known a lot of really good men like this over the years. Yes, they got snarfed up. But if you say you've never seen mean like this, you're not looking in the right place. Because they're there. A lot of them.
I wasn't totally correct, but many years ago, I remember trying to convince my cousin about this and I said something I still like: If you only go to bars to meet guys, the only guys you're going to meet are guys who go to bars to meet girls.
In hindsight, some of those good guys are actually there.
I married someone with about 90% of those attributes, 26 years and counting. I'd add men: who have a sense of humor, men who don't take themselves too seriously
This made me weep because I have never known such a man and now at 72 years old I am afraid I never will. But better to be alone than wish you were.🇨🇦✌️
I have a dear friend whom I met 6 years ago. She had just turned 70 and had recently divorced her 2nd crappy husband.
She swore she'd never marry again, but dated several men.
18 months ago she started dated a GOOD man and agreed to marry him last month.
He's been at her side for everything.
Oof this comment reminded me to raise my sons right. So far, so good, but they're still learning. I hope grown men do more learning and you find one who did!
I would add to that men who are secure in themselves. I married a soft spoken, gentle, “patient” man, but his insecurities turned our marriage into a living hell, and he ended up almost killing me. He was not so gentle when he was not able to control me.
Don’t hate yourself and don’t date someone who hates themselves. That is where all of this is coming from. All of these horrible people doing horrible things is because they are insecure, afraid, and full of self hatred.
Married to one for 18 years. My parents were at first convinced that he was a pushover... but he has a core of steel. NOTHING will get him to move from his core convictions and principles. He may be quiet, but don't underestimate him.
Your friend zone. People who make money off dating try to make young people believe that the friend zone is a bad place, but will they/won't they fiction is so satisfying for a reason. Those are the best relationships!
Oof. My pardner of 20 years was a housemate I met when I was 28, so there's new friends in unexpected times and places. But yeah, white men on average... yuck.
A great way to judge a man (or anyone) is to witness how they treat servers, cashiers, anyone in the service industry. Their interactions are a clear view of who he/she is. It’s just that simple 🤷🏼♀️
I once dated a man who yelled and swore and called me names when we argued. I left after 9 months, but I shouldn't have ever tolerated that childish behavior. My current bf is so sweet and calm even when we have disagreements. I can never go back to hot tempered men.
Thanks for this suggestion, @bigempress41.bsky.social - I was reading the other comments, and this is one of my favorite threads of the day. So much love here. Bless you all, and to those who've lost a kind partner, my sincere condolences.
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signed,
old grandpa
In hindsight, some of those good guys are actually there.
She swore she'd never marry again, but dated several men.
18 months ago she started dated a GOOD man and agreed to marry him last month.
He's been at her side for everything.
"Don't let the smooth taste fool you"