the Neil Gaiman stuff sucks and it also sucks that it's an experience that thousands of women are familiar with even if their abusers weren't famous enough to command profiles in national publications
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They don’t necessarily need to even be particularly powerful, they just need to be able to exert power over someone vulnerable in some way, and they feel they’re entitled to what they take. We hear much less about the abusive losers, but they surely exist in greater numbers.
I'm sure it's not always the case, but I definitely found it helpful to connect with other women my shitty ex had also harmed; he had worked so hard to isolate us and manipulate narratives, it was cathartic to come together and share common experiences.
this needs no reply from the likes of me, other than to say i will continue to amplify your voice in my small sphere and appreciate the knowledge and wisdom you have to offer on this and many other important topics.
i feel blind & stupid in the face of these realities about gaiman i never imagined.
When I was dating I would try to reach out to the exes of someone I was interested in having a long term thing with. Always eye opening. Another clue was ask the man about his ex. How he speaks of her is very revealing as to his character.
And never, ever think you will be the one to not disappoint him. If a man calls his ex "psycho" or "crazy" that is a big hint that he is garbage. I always asked "What did you do that made her act that way? Surely she didn't start out like that." Their response spoke volumes.
This works for friendships too. If someone you're spending time with keeps complaining about how all their friendships/relationships end in drama, you have to look at the one common denominator. It will save you a lot of heartache and confusion to find this out early
If you started your inquiries with Gen X & before, the # of women familiar with this type of experience goes up exponentially. As to why Scarlett & others would continue to engage with him, one reason is that the delusion of any type of agency beats the desperate horror of the truth.
The article is based, at least in part, on a six-part podcast hosted by Tortoise Media called "Master: The Allegations Against Neil Gaiman that was launched online in early July 2024, with one update in August. I found it at https://tortoisemedia.com
Well, I finally got to the article and I got down the point where the girl is in a hot tub and Neil Diamond just shows up naked and I had to stop. Couldn’t go any further. Nope nope nope.
It worked for me when I opened it in Chrome and then just smashed that stop loading page X really fast. Just reload the page if it doesn't work the first time.
The way that he disappeared from here the instant rumors broke was not a great sign. The problem with predatory behavior is that it rarely makes sense, so you ignore a lot of early signs. You think, why would he coerce what is freely offered? Then you realize, the coercion is what they like.
I would include Amanda Palmer -- the article treated her with kid gloves but it's impossible to read it and think she wasn't fully aware, and the comment "I wish it was like the old days when we could both fuck you" is quite telling.
I didn't feel it treated her with kid gloves, it painted a portrait that was plenty damning.
It's just that she wasn't the focus of the piece, so her actions were left to stand without the same degree of commentary. But it's pretty clear she's aiding & abetting
Pure speculation, but my thought is that this is a case of 'They are taking a shot at the king' so to speak, and so they are remaining firmly neutral about her so that the coming fight over this article is just them vs Gaiman and not them vs Gaiman&Palmer.
Yeah you need to kneecap the Jeffrey Epsteins before you go whole hog on the Ghislaine Maxwells. From a reducing harm position, Given time Gaiman is going to find another Palmer, while Palmer won't find another Gaiman. But, yuck.
Scarlett Pavlovich's whole story is incredibly heartbreaking for many reasons but the thing that really sticks with me is the amount of trust she placed in Palmer and how completely and thoroughly Palmer failed her.
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i feel blind & stupid in the face of these realities about gaiman i never imagined.
It's just that she wasn't the focus of the piece, so her actions were left to stand without the same degree of commentary. But it's pretty clear she's aiding & abetting
But it'sa really damning (for her) neutral