Their intentions don't matter if their behavior keeps hurting us. This is true of all relationships-- including w/ people, jobs, political parties, apps, & online platforms.
Sustainable recovery has no illusions about intention vs. impact.
Sustainable recovery has no illusions about intention vs. impact.
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Not only because I had to realize that the same rules apply to myself, but because I also had to realize just how many people I'd given far too many chances.
I can't get the time or energy back, but damn those were sobering moments.
How do you feel now, at this stage of healing or your life in general?
So there's a lot of shame both for my behavior and the behavior I allowed towards me. Shame, disappointment, and anger.
I now understand the "anger" that is mentioned in recovery, though. It's a very constructive anger, actually.
I stand up for myself now, thanks to that aforementioned anger.
Being angry at others helps me see through and ignore their posturing and abuse. I don't fight what isn't worth my time or energy.