When I meet folks who hate the friends of their partners, it gives me pause. This person represents one side of your partner and a component of their value system... if you really *hate* them, that reflects something.
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I feel like it could go either way. I’ve met people who are amazing and lovely and kind, and their partners are not, or I see them treating them badly. I don’t always say anything, but it’s usually how they treat my friend that makes me dislike them.
Oh, I think your friends can definitely hate your partner.... But the reverse is tricky and implies worrisome things to me. Mostly because friends can exist at different levels of intimacy/connection but a life partner in theory has to be prepared to exist in most/all of them.
yep! I was so happy that my partner ended up vibing with my friends really well and they with her.
It was also a relief to find her friends were pretty fascinating... and I was also finding weird echoes to some of my own group in them as well. It was like a weird alt gender mirror in some ways.
That's awesome and kind of a cool insight to carry! There have definitely been folks my partners were friends with that I didn't particularly care for, but I think if I truly hated any of them, I'd have to unpack that to decide if we were going anywhere healthy.
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It was also a relief to find her friends were pretty fascinating... and I was also finding weird echoes to some of my own group in them as well. It was like a weird alt gender mirror in some ways.