One of the earliest things my mother taught me was, "Never discuss religion or politics." No matter how hard you try, civility flies out the window in a discussion about today's politics.
The best thing we can do is start having conversations with those who don't share our mindset. Find out what they care about and ask questions like “If this is just normal government turnover, why are nonpartisan career officials being replaced by loyalists?”
Take it and try somewhere else. Family (as I have also found) can be the most difficult conversation as there are so many underlying dynamics but at least you are planting seeds. If you only get real answers from 1 or 2 people that's OK. This is the Way.
Civil discussion around difficult topics require an understanding of the rules and decorum involved in clear and effective dialogue.
Americans, as a rule, don't like rules.
The internet has also given everyone tiktok brain.
The forces are stacked against us.
I keep thinking about the hs debate team - do those exist anymore? In my day it seemed to attract an affluent nerdy white male type (who probs now run the country) but thinking: that shd not be an elective but a required class & learned skill for ALL.
I debated; the problem a I was taught the skill to win , not to be right or apologise when wrong . Too many of us were taught to dig in , have twisty tongues and 'be clever' We need less cleverness and more wisdom .
I was just ruminating on this in bed last night, having slept a bit fitfully and while attempting to order and quiet my thoughts. I have always detested and avoided conflict of any kind and probably would have benefitted greatly for some serious instruction in debate. I still suck at it, badly.
I was there in the streets fighting for civil rights and an end to the war. I never once imagined that our freedom would once again be in jeopardy. Just goes to show evil never rests.
Civility is over discussing things like immigration controls or the best allocation of tax dollars - not over who does and doesn't qualify to be treated like a Human fucking Being.
My mom refused to allow her last Girl Scout troop to discuss politics or social issues because she didn't want to have to moderate/educate them on how to properly debate. It's also why we can't discuss those issues at family dinner nights. This leads to a lot of the silent treatment.
Sometimes civility involves telling off or threatening persistent bad actors, IMHO. The idea that cowardice is the same as civility has given civility a bad name.
Yes! I decided to stay on FB and have been posting updates on how things are going. I've had 3 trump voters reply and try to mansplain his good changes. I have seen many of my friends posting more against 45. I hope it at least make people think.
In any study of autocratic takeover it’s been shown that giving radicals a platform legitimizes lunacy and makes sanity seems outdated. You really have to step up and fact-check mercilessly, and try not to give a voice to the fringes. Don’t know how we do that now. 🤷♂️
Probably why I can’t talk with my own family members. No practice. I don’t belong to their church denomination, and most don’t agree with my politics. But everyone lives out of state, so we aren’t fighting in person. Ignoring is easier. But, sometimes my mouth gets the better of me!
I left my family cult too. This automatically makes them believe I could not possibly recognize any truth, especially if it's something they don't recognize. People only leave cults to sin don't ya know? Can't trust those willful sinners lol
I think if the populace had a better understanding of what it is they are speaking about, pro or con that discussions would be more productive versus everything based on emotions, rather than knowledge, which never works. Question is how do we get there?
or not to make it a difficult topic. The weaponization of ideas did not come from the people. It's the people who believe the right wing politicians that have always been the problem
(And I’d like to humbly add the following: being taught how to *diplomatically* DISCUSS the inherent biases/flaws of certain beliefs/stances, as well as how to *independently* HEAR those flaws without taking it as a personal affront to one’s sense of self. 🙄)
My kids’ teacher was a teacher in Newtown during the Sandy Hook massacre. He teaches the kids how to discuss weighty subjects with respect for factual information and for each other.
Well the time for conversation and strongly worded letters is gone. We need senators to forec their way past Elmo's rent-a-cops. go into OUR government buildings and stop the illegal DOGE activity. Get arrested on camera. Tammy Duckworth--a disabled female combat vet--should lead the charge.
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OK, where do we take the “conversation” from there?
Because this has been my entire life with my family for nearly 60 years.
Americans, as a rule, don't like rules.
The internet has also given everyone tiktok brain.
The forces are stacked against us.
Conversation doesn’t alter them. See cult.
We must keep beliefs out of our laws.
When I became an adult, I was told those growing concerns and questions were due to a lack of faith and self-study.
The real message was always "Stop asking questions"
Dems version of intimidation: strongly worded* press conference
*Even that is no longer Dems schtick though... it's more "we have no majority, we're screwed" (per Rep. Jeffries anyway) 🙄
People take pride in not being civil. It is not allowed to be tried.
*past
(And I’d like to humbly add the following: being taught how to *diplomatically* DISCUSS the inherent biases/flaws of certain beliefs/stances, as well as how to *independently* HEAR those flaws without taking it as a personal affront to one’s sense of self. 🙄)
It's time to point out the bad guys now in this moment.
Neither are more important than democracy
We now have two choices. Live free or kneel to your MAGA king like a slave.
Color? Gender? Race? Immigrant? Rural? Urban? Worker? Boss? Poor? Rich? Red? Blue? Your flag is one of these.
I know which one is mine.
With people who scream
“Go fuck yourself”
The moment they feel their fragile grip on the facts and conversation slipping.