Why are the Charmin bears always shitting and wiping their ass what’s with that - ThreadSky

davemcelfatrick.bsky.social • 1 day ago

Why are the Charmin bears always shitting and wiping their ass what’s with that

Comments

truantmusic.bsky.social•1 day ago

I always thought that bears used rabbits to wipe

heathcliffhelms.heathcliff.cat•1 day ago

They call him Pooh Bear because he shits and doesn't wipe his ass, they're trying to avoid that fate.

martti.bsky.social•1 day ago

Hey, it’s called IBS and it’s no laughing matter. Those poor damn bears. All that fur…

jacobchef.bsky.social•1 day ago

Survivorship bias. They only show you them when they’re shitting and wiping ass.

guttsymalone.bsky.social•1 day ago

I read that as "chairman bears"

treziok.bsky.social•1 day ago

Maybe they ran out of rabbits

siso00.bsky.social•1 day ago

They’re just like me fr

jasn0x.bsky.social•1 day ago

Does a bear shit in the woods? And if it does then how does it wipe its behind?

drunkcat.bsky.social•1 day ago

deep state anti-bidet propagandists

abbylark.bsky.social•1 day ago

I hate them sooooo much

elfdestruct.bsky.social•1 day ago

Humans these days are a really fatty food.

iwassohigh.bsky.social•1 day ago

I actually Stopped using toilet paper once it was clear that you could be attacked by bears while buying it

iwassohigh.bsky.social•1 day ago

They preferred it to hibernation

kikaimori.bsky.social•1 day ago

It's what they do, some bears shit in the woods, some bears catch salmon at the river, some bears even are advocates in fire safety, they're the bears that wipe ass and sell toilet paper.
It's what they do.

raeman.bsky.social•1 day ago

The company is forcing laxatives in them in order to make these ads.

leemcn.bsky.social•1 day ago

And they literally don’t talk about ANYTHING else. Average sentence out of their mouth is “Hi son! I just love wiping my crack with toilet paper!” WHO TALKS LIKE THAT

wyles.bsky.social•22 hours ago

A man crushing his sons balls in his ass like Mr Feeny did to Ben Shapiro in the hit Pulitzer Prize winning podcast "Cumtown"

wyles.bsky.social•22 hours ago

Because they're scatophile rapists.

it's why the father bear got his voice replaced in those commercials. The actor clearly got too into the role and wiped someone's ass with his cock unwillingly

johnnyhammerstyx.bsky.social•1 day ago

There's an old time proverb of "Does a Bear shit in the woods?" and they made it into a Toilet Paper Empire

abbylark.bsky.social•1 day ago

Yeah the original ads did have them in the woods

xergg.bsky.social•1 day ago

Them bares got them ibs or I'm a wombats aunt.

maliburek.bsky.social•1 day ago

Why are the bears sometimes red and sometimes brown yet the voices are always the same?

oswaldepic.bsky.social•23 hours ago

I just realized this and now I’m angry about it

maliburek.bsky.social•20 hours ago

It pisses my wife off every time lol

agoreaphobe.bsky.social•1 day ago

the real question is does a bear ever stop shitting in the woods.

mookstyfawker.bsky.social•1 day ago

It's probably the one ongoing commercial thing that actually weirds me out.

falschspieler.com•1 day ago

They’re bears. They shit in the woods.

justdrbork.bsky.social•1 day ago

Now that I think about it, you bring up a valid point

allenchristian.bsky.social•1 day ago

I mean, I am probably doing it more than they are, but I have some fucking decorum about it.

theramblerouser.bsky.social•1 day ago

I for one blame society for convincing us all there's only one thing a bear can do in the woods

antoinettethag.com•1 day ago

It's like a whole village of folks with IBS

jonmokoko.bsky.social•23 hours ago

As someone who recently started using a VPN and as such discovered these bears...

...is it part of American culture to come out of the toilet to display and parade your shit free arse to the rest of the family?

kingofcatastrophy.bsky.social•23 hours ago

No, at least I hope not, but there are some real freaks out there.

jonmokoko.bsky.social•23 hours ago

Y'see... the thing is.

I'd always heard the phrase "shooting the shit" and given the stereotype of the US I'd assumed you guys used the shockwaves of high powered firearms to literally blast your arses clean.

So, the bears were quite a surprise.

wyles.bsky.social•22 hours ago

Not really.

Tho on the far right it's considered gay to wipe your ass, so showing your shit encrusted cheeks will earn you cred with Elon Musk, Ted Nugent, and other right wing manchild pedophiles.

naffnaffbobface.bsky.social•1 day ago

Do you remember when that toilet roll company was all like "do you fold or do you scrunch?" And everyone was all like "ewww gross leave us alone creeper" and now the world is on fire? Yeah turns out it was our last chance, if we'd just got everyone folding consumption of trees would have gone down.

emceehammerpants.bsky.social•1 day ago

Do you not wipe your ass when you shit? It’s very important to do that.

antigoneprogone.bsky.social•1 day ago

The bears have rich inner lives. We only see them when they're pooping. The mom bear is a stenographer for the Louisiana Supreme Court.

p1vs-v1tra.bsky.social•1 day ago

Makes you think.. humans are the only beings that wipe their butts

blooregardq.bsky.social•1 day ago

“ does a bear shit in the woods”

rafaelninja13.bsky.social•1 day ago

https://youtu.be/IMKW-ifxikE?si=Zmts9O83uMj4v5L7

maximumeffort433.bsky.social•1 day ago

Cocaine is a laxative.

clayndwoods.bsky.social•1 day ago

Bear to the rabbit: Does shit stick to your fur?
Rabbit to bear: No, I have no problem with that.
So the bear shit in the woods and wiped his ass with the rabbit. There was no Charmin to be had at the time...

Comments

Posting Rules

Reply