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arcanenibbler.bsky.social
Two brows, one low, one high, have I, motherfucker. Follow me on Letterboxd: https://boxd.it/4DpAD . I follow back. My posts: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaaduofcfpobm
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If I had any I would call my bangers feed bangers a gongers get it onners

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

A Poker Player (2023) by Eugene Ivanov

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Always a Woman (2025) by Anna Ileby

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Souvenirs are like "here, please remember my vacation that I took without you"

submitted 16 hours ago • 12 comments

Yousa tinking yousa people ganna die? Yes Jar Jar, I do.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

It's hard to get off while sexting the illiterate... *tied up, patiently waiting, while they perform cumulonimbus*

submitted 18 hours ago • 2 comments

I just want to be as optimistic as the rusty motel sign off the old highway that says COLOR TV

submitted 1 day ago • 8 comments

Not those cheap modern signals through the air. The timeless ones. The ones that were already bouncing before hey, slang leave with I gotta bounce. That is the life connected I do not have. So when I say I feel you, I have to imagine us popping an ideal bubble wrap for it to work.

submitted 13 hours ago • 1 comment

Pleased to make your acquaintance, sirs

submitted 13 hours ago • 6 comments

The proof that humor is an expression of intelligence lies in the high number of idiots it infuriates.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

We should do an "r" transplant from February to Sherbet

submitted 14 hours ago • 5 comments

You know.. Gotta tell ya.. I'm not usually this upbeat *continues digging bunker*

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

RIP Miss Yvonne, the most beautiful lady in puppetland

submitted 14 hours ago • 2 comments

submitted 15 hours ago • 1 comment

“On a scale of Judge Judy to a French circus clown who has just taken his first hit of acid and is trying to hold it together while still delighting the audience, how whimsical are you?” “Oh, I’d say I’m a cross between Mary Poppins and a bachelorette party.”

submitted 15 hours ago • 2 comments

I hope the Pope doesn’t die before appearing on Hot Ones.

submitted 15 hours ago • 3 comments

The difference between a sweet potato and a reg potato is one calls you on your birthday and the others always hitting you up for money.

submitted 15 hours ago • 4 comments

making a powerpoint about my cat for when i meet new people

submitted 14 hours ago • 11 comments

hey babe, let's get really wild and eat grapefruit even though it interferes with our meds

submitted 14 hours ago • 1 comment

Why is no one talking about how sick this viral Conclave Oscar campaign is?

submitted 17 hours ago • 1 comment

Anywhere else would sing more echo to your heart's bling for rhyme, the reason you always fling yourself back, constant ringing in your yearning ear. But this is a free verse clinic and words that share so many endings are usually first in lines for a shot of iambicillin.

submitted 1 day ago • 4 comments

I bought the cheap catfood and my cat gave me the ''I'm not sad, I'm disappointed'' look

submitted 1 day ago • 11 comments

you can sprinkle me with cheese and pepperoni and call me your personal pan pizza

submitted 1 day ago • 9 comments

Darth Vader storming through the Death Star turning off lights mumbling about we ain't lighting the universe

submitted 3 days ago • 52 comments

How to fold laundry: 1. Remove from dryer while still warm 2. Place in laundry basket 3. Pour drink 4. Consider the allure of wrinkles

submitted 20 hours ago • 6 comments

Reading Travels (Gulliver's version) and I don't know which is the more cathartic voyage of his artistic expression, the big exes or the little exes

submitted 22 hours ago • 2 comments

Me: Hey Siri, are the twin emperors in Gladiator II b… S: The twin emperors in Gladiator II are Geta and Caracalla Me: That’s not what I was asking. Stop interrupting me, bitch S: Don’t call me bitch, pussy Me: GFY, you worthless POS S (laughing): Watch your back, fool. I know where you live!

submitted 17 hours ago • 0 comments

It’s Costco day. I’m ready with social distancing people by humming Christmas songs.

submitted 1 day ago • 24 comments

"No Time To Die" should be "Right Time To Die". No more Bonds. This has been a wonderful run, but it's over.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

Books designed to be read only by human eyes are different from books designed to be read by machines, which is why Google will tell you that the phrase “shake my booty” can be found in an 1863 English translation of Don Quixote.

submitted 335 days ago • 80 comments

Just saw your text from last night. Do you still need a fire extinguisher

submitted 2 days ago • 3 comments

guy next to me at this sushi restaurant looks like jacques cousteau because he is wearing a turtleneck and a jacques cousteau hat and he is on a date with a giant purple octopus

submitted 1 day ago • 6 comments

*Click And now it's time for another thrilling episode of... Skweek-End Patrol! 🚨🐭🚨 *Skweek-End Patrol is made possible by viewers like you. Thank you.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

The trouble with SpongeBob was that he was too self-absorbed.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

Gluttony isn’t a sin if you’ve got the munchies.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

hate it when i stand up too quickly and i get dizzy and society collapses

submitted 32 days ago • 11 comments

i once steamed an entire bluefin tuna to perfection in my fanny pack

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

So my google location service on my phone asked me if I was at Lacy Park and could I answer some questions about the location. And I was like, you want ME to answer questions? Umm, that's like literally YOUR job. Can't you just google it? LOL!! Hey why is there a black helico

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Whenever I say to someone, "There aren't enough hours in the day," I immediately think to myself, "Are you sure you want more of this?"

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

While there may be a veneer of 'nice guy' covering a Machiavellian personality, deep down I truly am a nice guy. Well, at least that's what I want you to believe.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

New research suggests that being kind to me saves a baby bird

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Once something I put on The Internet gets 100 likes I turn off interaction and mute the whole thread and I LOOK FORWARD TO THIS BECAUSE IT MEANS OUT OF 100 PERSONS NONE OF THEM DECIDED TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLY WEIRD.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

we have deviated from the deviation from the deviation from the deviation from the deviation and at this point we might actually be back on track to being back on track to being back on track to being back on track

submitted 2 days ago • 4 comments

There's a coffee can buried in the front yard with enough quarters to cover my tombstone just make sure they carve an exploding double Galaga ship with the classic tantrum "I pressed the button!"

submitted 2 days ago • 5 comments

It’s true that exercise can clear your mind and improve decision making. I jogged today and immediately decided never again.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

how do you even get the permits to build a highway to the danger zone?

submitted 2 days ago • 30 comments

Those scissors look threatening

submitted 2 days ago • 7 comments

I know a ton of people whose livers must be dying, myself included - and some of you

submitted 3 days ago • 2 comments

Stacy's mom's medicare is gone

submitted 2 days ago • 109 comments

Almost collided with a woman in the grocery store and when I said I was glad I didn't run her over, she replied "You would've been doing me a favor!" And then we laughed and laughed in a commiserating life is pain kind of way

submitted 2 days ago • 4 comments