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bananapristine.bsky.social
Weirder, softer, tougher. Writing, drawing, complaining.
72 posts 10 followers 15 following
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I did 2 things today. Cannot recommend. Thank fuck I’m wfh tomorrow because my social battery is 🪫.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

In an upsetting turn of events, I am routinely waking up at 4:45am ready to face the day.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Support unions- jack off all trades!

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Jesus, Dilbert, this isn’t about you. 

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

And lol, of course my adjusted Adderall is out of stock right now. Very cool.

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

Medication is such a tightrope walk. Enough Adderall to get my brain functional, not too much that my anxiety goes off the rails. Add this weird new thing and I can’t stay awake through the afternoon. 🫩

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

I am taking my second shower today because yardwork.

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

Until I find a way to make “Disneyland annual pass = gym membership,” I will settle for “yardwork = booty bootcamp.”

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

Is the lady on fire or is the portrait on fire?

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

Yeah I’m not kidding about the taco-boogers part.

submitted 46 days ago • 1 comment

Aging is also resigning yourself to eating a dry salad because the dressing options are untenable. I never thought I’d be that guy, but here I am, monch-cronchin’ away at a box of what appears to be everything that falls out of a hard-shell taco except meat.

submitted 46 days ago • 1 comment

The way my guts have so utterly betrayed me in the past few weeks is unholy. (Have I misunderstood shitposting?)

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

Aging is a dwindling list of pants you will put up with wearing.

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

General anesthesia is a trip. I time travel, then have to re-learn how to shit.

submitted 62 days ago • 0 comments

Dry Bones warned me about this, and I didn’t listen- the knee pain connected to the back pain.

submitted 67 days ago • 0 comments

There’s a lot more dust as an adult than I thought I’d be up against when I was young. Do we live in dustier times? Was my mom furtively, constantly dusting surfaces? The world is a mystery.

submitted 67 days ago • 0 comments

It feels like my knee is going to explode goo. Thank goodness I’m not at home. I imagine my kneecap blowing off like a manhole cover.

submitted 78 days ago • 1 comment

Literally pulled an Adderall out of my mouth like when your dog tries to eat a grape. I’m so sleepy and went into autopilot with my bedside meds. 🫠

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

If I met my younger self for coffee, I’d backhand that dumbass for not being sluttier. That said she’d probably blow clove smoke in my face.

submitted 86 days ago • 0 comments

I’m not like other girls; I’m middle-aged and arthritic.

submitted 86 days ago • 0 comments

Nothing makes you confront your own ableism like a disabling event. 🤡 Disability is inevitable if you live long enough. Making places more accessible and accommodating is simple common sense in an aging society.

submitted 87 days ago • 1 comment

Da'Vine Joy Randolph deserves another reward for her presentation of this years supporting actress nominees. Can you get an Emmy for that?

submitted 88 days ago • 1 comment

Growth is blocking “Nancy Pelosi” begging for $15 and reporting as spam without telling the bot or volunteer to fuck off.

submitted 88 days ago • 0 comments

After watching Raising Arizona for the first time I could see Tippytoes Chardonnay as HI in a remake. Or just, like, a really good Halloween costume.

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments

And of course I cried at Sean Baker’s call to save independent movie theaters. Guess that was a decent way to go out??

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

Love how Hulu just decided the Oscars were over for us after Best Director. A+ service. Also how we couldn’t get into the app until Best Live Action Short? To hell with it.

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

By rounding, I have zero followers. That said, I’m delighted to nudge anyone happening by to subscribe. Caught CRpTAC at SF Sketchfest and very nearly had an asthma attack from laughing. (High praise.)

submitted 91 days ago • 1 comment

Annoyed at myself for treating my body like everything I own- future garbage.

submitted 93 days ago • 1 comment

Petition to call RFKs ADHD wellness farms “lack of concentration camps.”

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

Sending myself password reset requests so I get any email at work. Like, did someone forget to fire me?

submitted 94 days ago • 0 comments

Is One Week the millennial Margaritaville? My only argument is that the choruses talk about fault/ who is to blame shifts through the course of the song it’s not a good argument and I have not given it much thought beyond that.

submitted 98 days ago • 0 comments

Aging is playing whack-a-mole with aches and pains. Shoulder feeling ok? Your knee is FUBAR. Finally rehabbed that knee? Have a hip problem. Fuck this busted meatsack. 🫠

submitted 98 days ago • 0 comments