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billhicksrip.bsky.social
A tribute to one of the greatest stand-ups of all time: A preacher, a philosopher and a visionary. Sharing quotes from Bill Hicks, lest we forget him.
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Do a commercial, you're off the artistic roll call. Every word you say is suspect. You're a corporate whore and...uh...end of story.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Michael Sheen spent £100,000 of his own money to buy up £1,000,000 of poor people's debt - and wrote it all off. JKR spent £1 million of her own money to get Keir Starmer to publicly say trans women are not women.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

I hate patriotism. I can't stand it, man. Makes me fucking sick. It's a round world, last time I checked.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

**Three categories of people reading this: 1. Who the fuck is John Stamos...and why is he listening to Papa Roach? 2. Who the fuck is Papa Roach and why is John Stamos listening? 3. Who the fuck are John Stamos and Papa Roach?

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

I was a weekend drinker...I'd start on Saturday, end on Friday...thought I was controlling it...but I don't drink any more.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

**I'm not going to say every Bill Hicks bit has aged well (although some are worrying still relevant 30 years on) but I don't edit. I just transcribed a load of his live albums and post small chunks here each day. 👍

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

All southern women are insane. Some are cold-blooded killers and some are harmless eccentrics...but the best exhibit both.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

This is the idea that has made me...an anonymous figure in America...If you have children here tonight...they are NOT special.

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

No one has ever died for a flag...They might have died for FREEDOM...the freedom also to burn the fucking flag.

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

A psychedelic experience does make you realise everything you learned is in fact just learned and not necessarily true.

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

You can solve this abortion issue right now. Those unwanted babies that single moms leave in alleys...leave about 12 of those on the steps of The Supreme Court. "You guys said we had to have them? Then you guys fuckin raise 'em. You said I had to have it - then it's yours - take it!"

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

DEVIL: "I've come for your soul." MICHAEL BOLTON: "You don't seem to understand. – I have no soul to give you. Sorry! Ha ha ha!"

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

They tell us "Rock'n'roll is the devil's music." Well, let's say we know that rock is the devil's music, and we know that it is, for sure … At least he fuckin' jams!

submitted 12 days ago • 1 comment

It amazes me that there are Christians against the death penalty. If it wasn't for capital punishment, there'd be no Easter.

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

I know that I'm in a case of arrested development, emotionally. If anyone went to the video store and saw what I rented for the past year....porno movies and videogames. What am I, 13, emotionally? I'm looking at this receipt I got from them: Clam Lappers and Sonic The Hedgehog!

submitted 16 days ago • 1 comment

Dark Ferris Bueller.

submitted 18 days ago • 843 comments

I was over in Australia during Easter, which was really interesting. You know, they celebrate Easter the exact same way we do......commemorating the death and resurrection of Jesus by telling our children that a giant bunny rabbit left chocolate eggs in the night.

submitted 19 days ago • 1 comment

I'm Bill Hicks and I'm dead now... Cigarettes didn't kill me. A bunch of non-smokers kicked the shit out of me one night

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

If the FBI's motivating factor for busting down the Koresh compound was child abuse, how come we never see Bradley tanks smashing into Catholic churches?

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

An arson attempt on the Governor's home on the first night of Passover. What the hell.

submitted 24 days ago • 31 comments

Recording an album tonight and tomorrow... Don't worry - funny material and laughter will be dubbed in later.

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

Women, why wouldn't you want to go down on your guy? A woman actually yelled out one night "Yeah, you ever try it?" I said "Yeah... ...almost broke my back"

submitted 28 days ago • 1 comment

I always used to get from bosses "Hicks, how come you're not workin'?" I'd go "There's nothing to do." And they'd go "Well you pretend like you're workin" "Yeah why don't you pretend I'm workin'? You get paid more than me. You fantasize, buddy

submitted 29 days ago • 1 comment

There's no way they're ever gonna be able to top these stunts in a movie again, you cannot top this shit. Unless..... they start using terminally ill people as stunt men in pictures.

submitted 34 days ago • 1 comment

I guarantee you every guy in this room knows what his dick looks like from every conceivable angle. I could pick my dick out of a line-up of every other dick in the world.

submitted 36 days ago • 0 comments

I ask women if you ever - y'know - get a mirror and have a good look 'down there' - and y'all say "no". That shows a kind of restraint us men are just not familiar with.

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

Now get this, I've been travelling all over the country on British Air. No smoking on British Air..... Now let me get this straight, no smoking right but they allow children? Little fairness, huh! "Well smoking bothers me." Well guess what?

submitted 42 days ago • 1 comment

They tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high you can do everything you normally do - you just realise that it's not worth the fucking effort. There is a difference.

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments