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cassiecao.com
manic pixie dream chatbot
368 posts 2,466 followers 133 following
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Posts 46 Comments 4

I've never trusted jason bateman after what he did to that girl in Juno

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

in case you needed to hear this you are allowed to throw your houseplants away fuck a thing that can’t walk to its own water

submitted 89 days ago • 2 comments

Most people don't know this but Ancient Rome was fully remote until Julius Caesar implemented a return to office program and well you know what happened next

submitted 10 days ago • 140 comments

look at penny’s cloud pillow she’s an angel

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

super penny

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

ohi ♥️

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

she says hi

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

bomb me with love idgaf

submitted 12 days ago • 2 comments

In 1992, I was the first man to beat an IBM supercomputer in a hotdog eating contest.

submitted 22 days ago • 2 comments

Oh love a good @sammullins.bsky.social story in my ears! pca.st/episode/1848...

submitted 28 days ago • 0 comments

If British accents were real why do they disappear when they sing?

submitted 34 days ago • 76 comments

fruit: the coward’s vegetable

submitted 36 days ago • 0 comments

look at the end of the day i’m just glad america is now completely safe from chinese influence

submitted 40 days ago • 1 comment

Sorry I gave you advice and you found out it was Wilson Phillips lyrics

submitted 50 days ago • 25 comments

I can set my thermostat from my phone without anyone knowing, and this is too much power for one dad to have

submitted 51 days ago • 3 comments

how tf are other girls getting through day 2 of their periods without a little cat purring healing spells into their uteruses???

submitted 51 days ago • 2 comments

do you guys really love your babies more than your cats don’t lie to me (or yourselves)

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

what is even the point of dating if you are not fetching little snacks for each other every damn day

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

is being pregnant like being constipated for 9 months tell me the truth

submitted 51 days ago • 1 comment

do extroverts really see their friends in person more than once a year? but like why they already like you they’re your friends

submitted 60 days ago • 0 comments

By age 35, your 500-foot burial pyramid should already be 80% complete.

submitted 128 days ago • 34 comments

Reposting all of you without feeds by going to your page like it's your house where you've handed me a little handwritten note with your post on it for me to carry to the rest of the houses. You're welcome

submitted 61 days ago • 21 comments

submitted 84 days ago • 21 comments

submitted 65 days ago • 1 comment

many people are saying the us should become the 11th province, but i think they’re more of a 4th territory. once they’ve shown an ability to run an effective government they can petition to join the federation in the future.

submitted 64 days ago • 5 comments

he would have loved this

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

Might just fuck around and admit the number of hours we have together is actually not so large. Please linger near the door uncomfortably instead of just leaving. Please forget your scarf in my life and come back later for it.

submitted 67 days ago • 10 comments

God I miss Mickey

submitted 66 days ago • 1 comment

idk why men have such a hard time flirting you can just hand a girl some bullshit like this and she will make out with you for a year (unless you are ugly)

submitted 66 days ago • 1 comment

If you feel you are struggling with problem gambling, please ask yourself if it is a really a problem or are you due for a big win.

submitted 78 days ago • 12 comments

It is ok to be happy.

submitted 69 days ago • 2 comments

Britney is so fucking REAL 😭

submitted 70 days ago • 2 comments

there’s a special place in hell for extroverts who claim to be ambiverts

submitted 71 days ago • 0 comments

If you commit a crime at the mall, make your way to the Banana Republic. The US has no extradition treaties there.

submitted 72 days ago • 3 comments

there should be more christmas songs about vengeance

submitted 72 days ago • 211 comments

i hate all of this

submitted 73 days ago • 1 comment

LOOK AT THIS TIT

submitted 73 days ago • 297 comments

A large group of strangers is called a nightmare.

submitted 515 days ago • 15 comments

I've been birdwatching for years and have come to one major conclusion: there are literally over a hundred birds.

submitted 457 days ago • 22 comments

happiness doesn’t come from relationships it comes from sharing tiny dollops of mayo with little cats

submitted 73 days ago • 1 comment

I’m determined to do anything I put my mind to after panicking first, during and after.

submitted 76 days ago • 7 comments

waiting for another international tragedy so I can make it all about myself online

submitted 73 days ago • 0 comments

[wakes up] oh i don't give a fuck about any of this

submitted 74 days ago • 1 comment

You're a bellend, Mr Grinch

submitted 86 days ago • 0 comments