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claretheamazon.bsky.social
I'm pretty tall. I'm an ACSM-certified personal trainer. I like leftist politics, Pokemon, and good books. I can read Italian semi-adequately. I have ADHD.
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Posts 44 Comments 6

Earlier today I inhaled a potato chip, managed to cough it out but the damage remains. It was a perfect tariffs allegory.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Chalk art someone made in my blue town in this red state.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Trump is the kind of degenerate who would swing a baseball bat at your head and then mock you for flinching.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

MAGA don’t care about the economy Follow me on YouTube while you’re there

submitted 4 days ago • 24 comments

Trump calls his tariffs “medicine” for our economy. Remember: This is the guy who said to inject disinfectant to cure covid.

submitted 6 days ago • 137 comments

Saw a white SUV today with a "Mom of Sassholes" sticker and the personalized license plate "EZ4U2NV." It was the sort of Insufferable White Woman starter pack you rarely get to see in such totality.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Look at this Humpty Dumpty lookin' motherfucker

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

The fajita to tortilla ratio is way outta whack and it’s only gonna get worse with these tariffs.

submitted 9 days ago • 8 comments

Make America Great Depression Again

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

Okay, not even getting into whether siblings bathing together is odd, how in the FUCK do three adult women fit into the same bathtub?!

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

In this house, we believe: Cloud and Tifa are canon Steelers > Patriots Watching baseball on TV sucks Mayonnaise is disgusting "Smash" is unironically good Clay Aiken should've won season 2

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

It is 2002. I am 18 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis. It is 2008. I am 24 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis. It is 2020. I am 36 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis. It is 2025. I am 41 years old. We are in a—

submitted 11 days ago • 433 comments

Cory Booker did awesome. Now we need to see different Dem congresspeople doing this EVERY. SINGLE. WEEK. At least one a week.

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

Us to JD Vance:

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

Hot take: how come only God gets capitalized pronouns? Dolly Parton should get to be She/Her.

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

These millennial and gen X Republican lawmakers played Final Fantasy 7 back in the day and somehow thought Shinra were the GOOD guys. "Corporate dictatorship? Yas queen!"

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

I mentioned to my client today that it is interesting how the vast majority of personal training clients I've had have been liberal, and my theory that conservatives (Republicans or otherwise) just generally don't like to be challenged, whether it's physically, emotionally, or spiritually.

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

TIL there is a Dutch cyclist named Taco Van Der Hoorn. Say it aloud. Let it sink in.

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

Spray-Painted Penis Only Thing Holding Cybertruck Together

submitted 20 days ago • 486 comments

Theory: Elon's transphobia is driven by extreme jealousy of his daughter's gorgeous head of hair.

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

Theory: queer women are predisposed from birth to enjoy Chappell Roan. Even if they've never heard her music before, play them some Chappell Roan and see if they like it. It's the ultimate gaydar.

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

I’m not saying someone’s so pressed I was on the cover of Teen Vogue that they started posting a bunch of misinformation about trans ppl- no wait, I am. I am saying that

submitted 22 days ago • 153 comments

Numerous Teams Express Interest In Aaron Rodgers Playing Elsewhere

submitted 26 days ago • 53 comments

It's quite warm out, so you guessed it: the roads are clogged with countless twenty-something dudes and their situationships vaping while driving 10 under the speed limit.

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

Same vibes

submitted 32 days ago • 10 comments

Yep, it’s hard to disagree with this.

submitted 39 days ago • 568 comments

Donald Trump & Transgender Mice

submitted 38 days ago • 40 comments

After the election I asked my psych NP for some Xanax, and she gave me 15 pills. I think the fact that I still have six pills remaining of that initial script shows REMARKABLE restraint and perseverance.

submitted 38 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

This says it all.

submitted 42 days ago • 768 comments

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

What she said.

submitted 47 days ago • 1629 comments

I want a "Radicalized By Capitalism" T-shirt.

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

Wish I were one of Elon's kids so I'd never see him again

submitted 48 days ago • 146 comments

Brilliant protest. Yosemite National Park workers hung an upside-down American flag — traditionally a symbol of distress or a national threat — thousands of feet off the ground on the side of El Capitan.

submitted 49 days ago • 107 comments

Doing my part by wearing a "protect trans kids" T-shirt to the gym in a red state.

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

If I had a dollar for every time a mediocre white man came to an already-inhabited area and started naming shit after other mediocre white men, I'd be able to buy a president of my very own!

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

I dunno what's up with women who would never date a short guy. I've dated dudes half a foot shorter than me and I'm just like "climb me like a jungle gym, king."

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

I saw the Ninja Warrior DILF at the gym today and hooo-ee lemme tell ya, his calves are nicer than I expected.

submitted 53 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

Report: Average Male 4,000% Less Effective In Fights Than They Imagine theonion.com/report-...

submitted 59 days ago • 54 comments

Things are getting wild on interstate 69

submitted 63 days ago • 462 comments

(severely condescending tone) Umm let me explain something to you sweetie: [objectively the wrongest information you've ever heard]

submitted 61 days ago • 79 comments

In my ongoing effort to be on the absolute cutting edge of modern video games, I have ordered FF7 Crisis Core, which came out 18 years ago, along with a paperback BradyGames strategy guide which is now out of print.

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments