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donutscoffeeme.bsky.social
Queen of stoner munchies. Hedonistic trollop. Fat kid. NSFWish. Pervy humor. General silliness. Mental health realness. Body positive. 41. She/her. FDT. 🌷🌻🏳️‍🌈 My skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:yap3mq6zjuvocyxwtrdatbuk/feed/aaagwp4n4v4e6
1,822 posts 3,866 followers 860 following
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Posts 31 Comments 19

If you want to get me out of my clothes, all you have to do is my laundry.

submitted 8 hours ago • 4 comments

Bluesky is a magical place where people from all walks of life come together to ignore their loved ones

submitted 1 day ago • 4 comments

You start looking at your pictures and slowly start to realize you see me in the background of every one.

submitted 9 hours ago • 3 comments

My phone is trying to sabotage me by changing "small" to "anal" every single time.

submitted 9 hours ago • 2 comments

Looking at the last of the wine and telling myself mama didn't raise no quitter. The aftermath is for tomorrow me to deal with.

submitted 9 hours ago • 0 comments

Before you dm me, I hope you're prepared to brainstorm ways a little turtle ended up in my back yard.

submitted 9 hours ago • 4 comments

your honor, i’m a lover not a fighter

submitted 22 hours ago • 2 comments

Is this hell even fresh, bro?

submitted 22 hours ago • 3 comments

I don't like the term self-care. I say masturbation like an adult.

submitted 12 hours ago • 3 comments

Maybe we actually DO got a thing that’s called a radar love you freaking asshole

submitted 14 hours ago • 3 comments

Still thinking about the angry guy at the car wash. 'You notice that the wash isn't as good?? They're cutting corners! THEY'RE CUTTING CORNERS!', he spat, raising his swollen pink fist, his ginger beard shimmering with sweat.

submitted 10 hours ago • 1 comment

Wife: What are you thinking about Brain: don’t say titties Me: kitties Wife: Aww Brain: nice Me: soft round luscious kitties Brain: (leaves)

submitted 11 hours ago • 2 comments

You can't just sweep the elephant in the room under the rug.

submitted 18 hours ago • 1 comment

Let's runaway together but live in separate towns.

submitted 10 hours ago • 3 comments

“Gross!” ~Me to Me

submitted 12 hours ago • 1 comment

My onlyfans is just me trying to get the chick peas to stay on the fork when I’m eating a salad

submitted 21 hours ago • 7 comments

that one account i really like that i share a bajillion mutuals with that won't follow me back: me: why won't you love me?! 😭

submitted 11 hours ago • 8 comments

Sorry lovers, I drank too much haterade

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

Liking skeets as part of my mandatory community service.

submitted 15 hours ago • 0 comments

Slowly transforming this account into an unhinged stream of consciousness account.

submitted 10 hours ago • 11 comments

Are you okay bro? You’re listening to a lot of acoustic covers lately

submitted 12 hours ago • 9 comments

Wine drunk is probably a terrible time to break out those rusty conversational skills. Of course I'm gonna do it.

submitted 9 hours ago • 2 comments

99 bottles of beer, except it was 14 bottles of wine in the rack and now it's down to 12.

submitted 10 hours ago • 0 comments

I'll try to find my funny again soon. Currently I'm just so overwhelmed I don't feel anything. Be kind to each other.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

When everything sucks, wear cute earrings.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Your downward spiral or mine?

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

If the police can't find the cement truck that did this, it's $300 out of my pockets because a motherfucker couldn't be bothered to stop.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Insurance: Your deductible is $500 but because it wasn't your fault at all and some asshole didn't stop to give their information, you still have to pay $300. Fuck me.

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

Existing is exhausting. I'm too tired for this shit.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Ah yes. A hit and run car accident is just the thing I needed to follow up the entire air conditioner system dying.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

Phone changed "well fuck" to "we'll fuck" and now I have a date for sympathy sex.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment