draculaisland.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

thought I was all good when my doctor said i was healthy as a horse; turns out he was referring to one specific horse, 'Sick Matthew'

submitted 23 days ago • 5 comments

last night i attempted to fight adhd med anxiety by playing two of my favorite games: 2 hours of scrolling through tubi to find movies i want to watch that might be taken down before i get to them, and then 2 hours of organizing my phone homescreen

submitted 16 hours ago • 0 comments

I'm watching one of the newer James Bond movies and in one shot of a car chase you can see a bad guy has the license plate YU GI OH. I think it's by accident because the movie isn't about that

submitted 6 days ago • 3 comments

Texas chain saw massacre is full of plot holes... what happens to the victims when they die? is there an afterlife?

submitted 5 days ago • 14 comments

PSA that Eli Roth does not deserve your support, horror fans.

submitted 7 days ago • 196 comments

I'm so scared of cities. All those buildings so close to each other. You can go to the movie theater and a restaurant and the park while walking, in defiance of God. There are people you haven't met before. Sometimes there's a dog in a jacket

submitted 7 days ago • 154 comments

[game show announcer voice] who’s ready to vanish into a mysterious fog

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

"sbussy!" is a medieval swear short for "God's Bussy"

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

i’m going to tell nicole that jesus has materialized in a nearby grocery store and steal the tony from her as she wild-eyed looks through the heads of cabbage

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

It's probably bad for people and society that there is so much normalization of magic new agey woo shit right now but I do believe in "vibes" as a personal non-supernatural phenomenon which includes Received Vibes (RV) and Emitted Vibes (EV) though there is debate on whether all vibes are in fact RV

submitted 9 days ago • 11 comments

"My name is Greta Thunberg and I am from Sweden. If you see this video, we have been intercepted and kidnapped in international waters by the Israeli occupational forces, or forces that support Israel."

submitted 9 days ago • 243 comments

heartwarming video of man who just received cochlear implant hearing the video of the lady who fell and hurt herself stomping grapes on the news for the first time

submitted 9 days ago • 31 comments

bring back fatchu

submitted 23 days ago • 45 comments

We apologize for the recent behavior of the gorillas. Our sign language expert is going through a divorce.

submitted 14 days ago • 4 comments

watching Predator and i'd never really considered before how funny it is that Arnold is emphatically like "we're a RESCUE team" and there's a guy on the team with a, typically aircraft mounted, six barrel rotary machine gun. for rescuing. you can rescue up to 6000 guys per minute with this thing

submitted 10 days ago • 9 comments

hell yeahhh my favorite cheese is gay and woke

submitted 10 days ago • 1 comment

no more posting about any of those “writing routines of famous writers” unless it’s Edmund White’s

submitted 13 days ago • 65 comments

RIP Josie Carter who led the resistance against a group of Navy sailors who attempted to start a brawl against the queer patrons of the Black Nite. "We do not run from a fight. We do not run from anything."

submitted 12 days ago • 1 comment

pssshhhhhh FOOMP

submitted 18 days ago • 2 comments

I know posting "the girls are fighting" seems funny, but it's actually insensitive and shitty. My father died in a girl fight. He tried to break it up and the girls pulled him apart like freshly baked bread. He didn't even scream. One moment he was there, the next just a spray of dad viscera.

submitted 12 days ago • 244 comments

ME: yeah could i get the impossible burger with cheese. THE VIZIER WHO'S BEEN ADVISING ME: ahh, an excellent choice sire. an imitation of the genuine article. there are some "friends" of yours to whom it bears a passing similarity ME: you want anything VIZIER: [chuckles] what i want is of no import

submitted 16 days ago • 17 comments

groimes you haeve to come get me at Geetmo

submitted 12 days ago • 69 comments

submitted 13 days ago • 24 comments

Things that absolutely didn't happen

submitted 13 days ago • 72 comments

wearing a black jean jacket to the pharmacy on an 82° F day to look cool and hide my unfathomable escher-esque torso from the good townspeople

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

See why these studs are in so many carts. Cool Runnings (1993)

submitted 70 days ago • 0 comments

(stoically chopping wood at a remote cabin) Subway franchise manager: strange place to find the world's best sandwich artist me: ..that's the past. I left that life behind

submitted 64 days ago • 32 comments

introducing our new, nuclear-winter themed summer collection

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

(post-apocalypse dystopia where people who still know how to read are called wordwakers) Warlord: What does this one say, wordwaker? Me: Campbell’s chunky beef & vegetable

submitted 121 days ago • 32 comments

straight people love 2 things: - upholding a multi-millennia cultural practice of treating women as subhuman sexual property - calling gay people perverts

submitted 15 days ago • 1 comment

I love to push a button and receive a pellet. A delicious treat for me? Might as well push it again. If it gives me a small electric shock once in a while, well, that's just the cost of doing business

submitted 15 days ago • 57 comments

Me and my friends would have killed the Pride Cybertruck with hammers I can tell you that much

submitted 16 days ago • 9 comments

my one-kidney brother #digimon

submitted 17 days ago • 2 comments

it’s extremely funny to show up somewhere with a black eye and then say that you were punched by a baby

submitted 18 days ago • 109 comments

grooving to a prince song about sucking and fucking and then right at the end getting slapped in the face with the proselytizing

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

one must imagine sisyphus horny

submitted 22 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 23 days ago • 8 comments

Hail, Dorian.

submitted 23 days ago • 40 comments

Antivaxx and libertarianism are the same--they can exist only when the majority of the population buys in to what it takes to live in a society, allowing the minority to think they are outsiders thriving on their own exceptionalism.

submitted 24 days ago • 45 comments

For a long time, humorous clips of Mario saying "Hello door" and "Another door?!" in Super Mario Sunshine were known about, but presumed unused. It turns out they can actually be heard in the game by performing an unreasonably specific action in the debug testing room.

submitted 24 days ago • 45 comments

and remember guys, i'm hunting you for sport so i expect to see some sportsmanship out there alright, no tricks. no tricking me

submitted 100 days ago • 2 comments