fartfactory.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

When i cum

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Monitor of the halls Monitors of the balls Hall monitor 2025 okurrrr

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Vote for me! I have titties 3!

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Every morning i brush my teeth shave my legs brush my hair and scream wake up little girls to my nipples Its the only way to perk them up

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

I only have sex to nora jones, LIGHTS ON, eyes shut, once a year, with my ex husband, on a bench, screaming in french

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

French fry is what I call my boyfriend’s dick. Its long skinny and salty af

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

My grandmother owned a mink coat. She killed the mink herself in 1903 with her bare teeth. It was the winter and they had run out of squirrel meat. She had no other choice. She also killed my grandpa and turned him into a chair She was such a craftsman- ahead of her time

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

You cant toss my salad because theres no dressing So bring lube ok

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Im basically im a snail My pussy is always leaking and leaving a slimy trail Men love it, Women fear it

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

Who needs crude oil when my jizz can power the world

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

How are there no faggots on summer house????

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

I just found out i have gout from my rich inner life

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

This and some hole

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

gdamn faa is not doing its job i saw that bitch pink flip flop over my house again THIS IS A NO FLY ZONE U HAG

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

If u don’t wanna be stupid don’t have a learning disability?

submitted 23 days ago • 0 comments

I was on a yacht in Greece getting my pussy flicked and licked by a young man named kyle. I squirted so hard i made the Mediterranean sea

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

i was on a yacht in the med higher than a mick jagger after ingesting an entire cvs pharmacy and … i caused a small accident … fine ill admit it i did the costa condoria blew that lil capt so good he took the fall mmhmmmm

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

Today i got the sexiest little note from a young man I saw sneaking around my property it says PACKAGE UNABLE TO BE DELIVERED ERROR CODE 726369456. SIGNATURE NEEDED. NO ONE PRESENT AT PROPERTY AT TIME OF DELIVERY. God, he just met me and already knows how to make me feel like a real woman!

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

i reached a new level of full body orgasm- all it took is those little french freaks from cirque de sole to trample my pinky toe while they mime chicago the musical in x2 speed

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

They say theres a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow - well thats true. But actually the “pot” is my gaping ass hole and the “gold” is the turds you can visibility see from the outside.

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

‘Ding dong ditch’ sure i love to get dicked down in trenches ditches and small canals next question

submitted 30 days ago • 0 comments

You better love threesomes because Jesus Christ is ALWAYS with me

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

its says LEAVE IN CONDITION ive never washed it out This is why despite the “record winds” my hair remains ROCK HARD and pointed towards the vatican

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

I was conditioned as a young child to go into “attack mode” whenever someone says the word “ok” Now everytime i hear “ok”, i whip out a baseball bat and go to town killing anyone insight. Somtimes its fun like when i killed my highschool bully. Sometimes its sad like when i killed my husband

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

i will NEVER be patronizing sunshine market again ShEILA that clown behind the meat counter cut the ham too small to cover my nipples. what part of bagel nipples do u not understand

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

want a good time on a budget. go to target get some petroleum jelly its like $2 go outside the store spread it on those big sexy red balls and ride them until u cum. its free - and u can do it all night

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

This morning i was squeezing a bunch of lemons to make lemonade and i was thinking there must be an easier way to do this. Thats when it hit me! So i just flicked my bean squirted right into the lemon juice. A free and refreshing replacement to juicing all those pesky lemons!

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

they told me im not welcome back elton johns oscars party what they didnt anticipate was me enclosed in a giant tumble weed rolling down the hollywood hills cover in ash, tumbling right into that homos backyard !!! take that bruce at 1ace security BITCh

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

Do you wanna know why red carpets are red? Because they hire me to rub my period blood all over them! Duh!

submitted 45 days ago • 0 comments

I am launching an artisanal lotion line for sex workers called “handy & J” its dropping spring/fall

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

ronda u bitch i know you put nutmeg in that mac salad my labia is so swollen im rocking back and forth like a seesaw

submitted 48 days ago • 0 comments

My seamen has been proven to contain zero% sperm It is purely decorative, like your dads chest hair

submitted 48 days ago • 0 comments

10 years ago today I pushed two babies out of my vagina. As you were.

submitted 57 days ago • 16 comments

You’ll never guess where i put it…my hands Then i use my hands to rub my toes, then i use my toes to rub my back, then i use my back to rub my crack, then i use my crack to… Sell stocks and launch fireworks at childern

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

Nothing mysterious about looking horny at the libary I do it all the time because i wanna fuck the hot janitor Jack Hes a window

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

thinking about being mysterious at a library tomorrow 🤔

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

Ok you nasty buck teeth bitches take the pipe cleaner out of your ass and start scrubbing your mouth!!! Just because your breath smells like shit doesn’t mean it has to look like it too!

submitted 69 days ago • 0 comments

My acupuncturist Candalin doesnt like to treat my pussy lips anymore I tell her please its only way ill have good luck in the new year I shit myself in the waiting room and wiped with nat geo insert. Blood everywhere

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

My lower back is always in pain after i give birth (i do it weekly) To get relief make a special smoothie with kale and after birth It only relieves the pain is a pegan ritual performed under the moonlight with 3 fags and a bitch. They dance around me while i pass a kidney stone.

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

My pussy looks like this btw

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments