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hatpromise.bsky.social
35 posts 30 followers 26 following
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Posts 23 Comments 22

Tesla is up forty cents today. I guess the recall is raising demand by creating scarcity.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

I really feel for social studies teachers trying to teach children how the United States government works right now.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Sorry everyone, turns out it's too hard to go to Mars. Instead we're bringing Mars to you. It's gonna be desolate and shitty here now

submitted 6 days ago • 73 comments

*Lemongrab voice* ONE MILLION PERCENT! TARIFF!

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 9 days ago • 92 comments

“Officials liked what the man in the van set out to do - give all the children delicious candy - but have been frustrated by his reckless abduction approach”

submitted 14 days ago • 73 comments

Even if the US did spend $8M on gender-affirming care for mice, it's not like they did it for laughs. Testing the effects of human medical treatments on mice and rats is common practice. Not to mention that $8M is a drop in the ocean. They want to cut 100,000 TIMES that -- $800B -- from Medicaid.

submitted 15 days ago • 1 comment

BREAKING: "At 1:15 PM tomorrow, President Trump will pick a country's name out of a MAGA hat and impose crippling tariffs on that country's goods for four minutes. This will happen daily until America is great again."

submitted 15 days ago • 214 comments

Question for people who use cutesy insult names for political figures they don't like, like "T. Rump" and "Elongated Muskrat" -- What do you get out of using these names? It literally makes me physically cringe, like calling Hitler "The Fewer-er" or "Mister Mustache" or something.

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

Dear friend, Mr. Trump's coronation last week was a disgrace. As I bowed in protest, I thought to myself "What has become of our nation" Now it's all up to us. Can you spare $5, $10, or even $20 so I can attend the royal feast to continue the fight?

submitted 16 days ago • 37 comments

you’re fired. wait you’re rehired. email us a list of things you’ve done today wait forget it you’re fired again. come back your job was important. you’re fired. or hired. come in to the office. wait the office has no computers go home. we are the department of government efficiency.

submitted 17 days ago • 1579 comments

This is pretty good, but "available in 12 colors" should be printed on the shirt.

submitted 18 days ago • 0 comments

Welcome to Biden's America!

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

it’s cool that “learn to code” isn’t a meme anymore because there aren’t any coding jobs either 👍

submitted 25 days ago • 2 comments

It's true that Russia invaded Ukraine, not the other way around. But liberals explaining this to Republicans reeks of smugness.

submitted 26 days ago • 47 comments

Hypothesis: We're actually in the next Ghostbusters sequel, and the first thing a character thought of when asked to choose the form of the destructor was the doge meme.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

I don't have a good photo of it, but this guy comes running anytime Werner Herzog's voice is on the TV.

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

'Mexico' is masculine 'America' is feminine What I'm saying is that Trump changed the gender of a body of water

submitted 39 days ago • 33 comments

Dare we tempt coyotes with the knowledge of good and evil?

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

Having watched all the baby elephant videos I've been flooded with these past few days, I can only conclude that elephants are basically born into a real-life game of QWOP.

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

There's nothing big I can do, but one of the many tiny things I can do is to stop giving money to the NYT, even though all I've only been paying them for is games. RIP my 1,550-day crossword streak.

submitted 46 days ago • 0 comments

Me: Oh no that trolley is going to run us over! Guy tied up on the track next to me who somehow thinks he's actually the guy holding the lever: Lol cry more 😂

submitted 58 days ago • 73 comments

I guess I should open the one on the left first.

submitted 60 days ago • 0 comments